How far can you punt a football? Asking for a friend. (He's an NFL GM.)
...
(He's laughing.)
...
(He's calling all his GM buddies.)
...
(They're laughing.)
...
(They're still laughing.)
...
(They're watching tapes of you punting a football and puking from laughing.)
...
(They're deciding which one is gonna call you and pretend to…

Q: What's black and white and read all over?

He traveled.

I don't know. Could someone hired by ESPN to cover the NFL be capable of committing such a heinous crime? Seems unlikely.

Caterpillar

This is just the straw that broke the camel's back for me. I am sick of everything about this situation: the money grab, the duplicitous smiles, the pathetic back-biting. It's enough to make anyone want to stop watching altogether!

I don't like liking something Leno did.

"can do shot’s"

The only poll Newell should win is "Who's most likely to shut down the Golden Corral buffet single-handedly?"

The money will be paid in installments over 20 years

Rog: "OK guys, here it is...now go knock yourselves out! BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!"

When asked how they'd celebrate the landmark decision, most players said they planned to sit completely motionless in a darkened room.

Monday

I would have said this is a bad idea, but no one on the defense can tackle.

if x, x = 100, then r, g = 3. but y?

The Redskins doctors aren't very good at health evaluations. And their treatments usually just consist of handing out blankets.

RGIII: What is "100%" but a concept of wholeness? Can a man ever be "100%"? Or is he in a constant state of decline from the moment he is born, reflecting the natural entropy of the universe?

So if Griffin's health is x, x

It would be a nifty feature to have all the cat like pokemon ignore you when you stroke them.

LeBron's just doing what any good professional would — sweeping the rumors under a rug.