Team Hamlet. Did he handle stress well? No not at all. But his love notes? Douubt thou the stars are fire... All that talk of giving Ophelia a tumble. I love him.

What happened with that? The 70s were great for showing all different cultures and socioeconomic backgrounds, even body types. We've really regressed.

On a scale of 1 to 10, how much are you hating your notification alerts right now?

I'm sure that it's a mistake for me to jump into this thread but here I go. I've read maybe half of it (It's very disjointed with the replies) so excuse me if this has been already said.

I love this. Very 50s crooner.

I read as Laura being a fan, but okay.

I love Rodarte. I would wear their crazy clothes everyday, everywhere if I had that kind of money.

I love your smoking metaphor. Beautiful.

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Yes very much, in fact I slut shamed myself.

I completely agree. The setting gives the woman a (possibly false?) sense of safety that makes me think that there probably wouldn't be a lot of outtakes of the prank victims reacting with hostility.

I would prefer to read more virginity stories.

Grommet is slang for baby surfer in California. I've been hearing it my whole life and I'm old.

That cocky (no pun intended) voice was amazing. Never change it! Are you a writer now? Raw and great story.

You win.

I think it's time for you to clean up this thread. 403 responses is 380 too many. It's repetitive and at this point you must be frightened by your notifications. Time to dismiss Missy.

I need to know if your last name is Caruso, but that would be unsafe to ask because internet anonymity is important.

You should skip these kinds of posts then. Not everyone that reads Jezebel is fucked up about food and weight.

Where are you getting your information?

Robin Thicke has a big dick.