I was hoping you’d post a story about Ajit Pai trying to slide into Mia Khalifa’s DMs and being soundly rejected.

I don’t believe in much any more, but if Kurt Warner gets dragged into this, I’m burning the motherfucker down

Pictured: Drew Magary upon hearing this news

Richardson was apparently very disappointed to learn he had to sell the whole team rather than each player individually.

Mueller should change his name to Robert Transgender Fetus Climate Change and really put Trump in a Catch-22.

Counterargument: What is college football if not shitty football featuring almost exclusively sub-practice-squad-level players?

Why in god’s name would you bring Steven Seagal to promote a physical fitness program?

Bullies frequently show remorse when (if) they grow up. Others go on to become CEOs.

My brain sucks. I keep thinking to myself “Yeah, go keep buying all this stuff that you don’t need, because you’ll eventually have a better paying job in the future.”

This. Former adult film actress here, emphasis on the actress. The sex, if you can call it that, is so mechanical. It truly is work, you’re often having to keep the D very shallow because that’s more appeasing to the eye so you’re really being penetrated over and over as opposed to just regular schmegular fucking.…

Ottawa moving to Quebec City would be the highlight of my life:

You forgot the most important part. The Argos are currently ached by...

All you need to know is that American sports trophies are presented to the owner first, but the Stanley Cup is given to the players first.

At least we Americans still have the Stanley Cup, the most beautiful of all championship trophies.

If they haven’t learned anything from California, it’s that the Leafs are just fuel for the Flames.

Somewhere in alabama roy moore both messed his pants AND declared this video some sort of commie, illegal immigrant witchcraft.

OMG, it even had the danger bay plug at the beginning. I miss that show :(

So much so that I started to write a comment here, then had to scroll back up to make sure which one I was making fun of.

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