What bugs me most is that Beyonce is quite possibly the ideal Jezebel celebrity. I never hear a bad word about her; I got jumped on last week for raising a mild question about her decision to take her 4-year-old to an awards show she couldn’t possibly appreciate, dressed in enough tulle to choke an ox. Basically, she…

I wasn’t saying it’s in conflict with cancer research: I was saying “vital” is an absurd word to use. It’s like when Buzzfeed starts a headline “people are freaking out about [insert random amusing thing here].” Words mean things: “Vital” doesn’t mean “valuable,” any more than “freaking out” means “laughing and moving…

“Vital” seems like a pretty strong word for snarking about celebrities’ incorrect views in an online echo chamber, but okay.

Just RT’d that and added you on Twitter. It really is perfect.

Right, and what I literally just said is “this isn’t my thing right now, but you guys keep at it if it makes you happy.” This is not shutting people down.

Yep. It’s funny: When the conventions happened and Americans saw who she was and heard the case for her (and also for Trump) she was up eight or ten points in the polls. And now that we’re back to the business as usual of going over everything Clinton does with a fine-toothed comb, her lead’s shrunk to four points or…

Oh, I suppose you aren’t wrong. I’m just tired of hearing about how Amy Schumer/Lena Dunham/Taylor Swift/whatever random blonde girl is unpopular this week is Doing Life Wrong, usually because the critic doesn’t like some offhand remark.

I think the latter, and it’s casually racist as fuck.

Raise your hand if you’re exhausted by feminists tearing other feminists apart.

That’s not my impression. I think the show very much knows how terrible Hannah is; somebody explicitly calls her out on being terrible at least once a season, and likely more. But I admit the show’s tone isn’t for everyone, and if it doesn’t work for you, so be it.

Oh, cool. Thanks! (And now I’m imagining the testes are like an ATM, where you can only take out $300 a day, only instead of money it’s sperm. This analogy may be funnier in my head.)

Half of the respondents believed that having sex more than once per day would increase their chances of conception

Do unaccompanied minors get to carry their own passports and tickets? Having also hung out with kids that age, there is no way I’d let them do that for longer than five minutes. It’s too hard for a kid that young to understand how important those specific pieces of paper are.

My guess is the boys looked vaguely alike and the flight attendants who were supposed to escort them just weren’t paying enough attention to which was which. Five is pretty young — probably they just followed the escorts without asking questions.

Oh, okay. You know the US military is already larger than the next five countries combined or something like that, right? What you’re saying is far from impossible, but the idea we’d need a draft strikes me as getting quite a bit ahead of ourselves.

No disrespect to Brit, but it’s always fun when performers in the Vegas/nostalgia tour phase of their careers think they’re still relevant.

Why? I mean, I’m not arguing that the guy sucks, but has he said something specific about bringing back a draft?

My 3-year-old’s suggestions for her brother’s name were Baby, Sweetheart, and Hername Two.

My daughter’s class last year had a Leila, a Layla and a Leyla. I never got it straight which was which.

I don’t think my mom regrets my name, but I think if she got a do-over she would have given my brother a different middle name so he didn’t have the exact same name as my dad (And his father, and his father. My brother is an IV.) It’s confusing, and being “Little Mark” when you’re 6'3" and coming up on 35 is just…