Well, he really seemed to have his hands full, if you know what I mean.

Why would he steal a box of raisins?

Remember when we were waiting for that table in that Chinese restaurant that time? That could be a TV show.

I could be a character.

You know, people think I'm smart, but I'm not smart.

I think every Puerto Rican in the world is out here.

Faster than a speeding bullet, Lois.

Well, at least there's no Traffic.

We found traces of a certain toxic adhesive commonly found in very low-priced envelopes.

No, no, no. Just a tiny bit. It's not even frontal nudity. It's…side-al nudity.

You know, for a fat guy you're not very jolly.

So what? It's a nipple. A little round circular protuberance. What's the big deal? Everybody's got them. See, I got them.

I'm into this Puerto Rican Day! The sights! The sounds! The hot, spicy flavor of it all! It's caliente, Jerry!

You know, just admitting a man is handsome doesn't necessarily make you a homosexual.

Yeah, I already did it.

I'm sorry, the card says MOOPs.

Grime, grease, filth, funk, ooze. Whatever it is, you take that stuff and put it right on my leather upholstery.

How did you get the goop out of the top of the dish-washing liquid?

The tomato's an anomaly.

No one wants to admit to them that they stuck something up there.