Hey, sweet avatar!

I caught my husband with his pants off. It was pretty horrible.

Hear ye, hear ye. I guess I understand why polyester turns up so often in inexpensive clothes — it's cheap and it's easy to work with — but seeing it in higher-end items is always perplexing. Who buys a $150, $200, or $300 polyester dress? People who didn't read the fabric content section? People who don't have sweat…

You and me both, lady!

Loved this book! One of the many things I learned is that — contrary to what the redditor quoted above says — a drinking establishment that sold ale would not have been called a tavern. Taverns sold wine and thus were frequented primarily by the wealthy. Ale for the lower orders was sold in an alehouse. Also, ale…

This one weird trick will change everything!

For real! For whatever reason, fever + narcotics = online shopping bonanza! Although I imagine Miley Cyrus's purchases are far more rock and roll than mine. I bet she buys leather pants and high-end lingerie and the like. I buy billowy tops and sale-price stretch pants.

Here in Seattle the empty bus seat is occasionally poop but usually vomit. But that's probably only because it's easier to pop a squat in the corner of a train car than on a bus seat.

Sorry for the late reply ... just noticed this! I would love to answer your muumuu questions! The one I have is no longer available, but it's similar to the batik print jobbie. It's a woven cotton, so the sheerness and softness are similar to woven (as opposed to knit) cotton pajamas. It's pretty opaque: in a…

I think we're on a similar wavelength.

The Vermont Country store is AWESOME. I have one of their muumuus and wear it proudly on hot summer days. My husband was taken aback to find that they sell vibrators. Yep. Vibrators, muumuus, old-timey candy: if you are a woman of a certain age (or aspire to someday become a woman of a certain age), they have…

J. Peterman Co.! I loved the catalogs so much and spent many happy latchkey kid afternoons imagining myself on an Edwardian hunting outing or a Nile steamer cruise. Then a bricks-and-mortar store opened in my area and it was so damn disappointing. A $250 linen shirt seems like a great idea on the catalog page, but…

Those sleeves are killing me! It's like some elbow-length gloves lost their fingers, grew some bell ends, and sprouted some crazy lace to attach themselves to that poor model's arm.

It can hundreds of dollars WITH insurance! I had to have an ambulance take me to the hospital a few years ago and even with an excellent-by-American-standards insurance plan, my "coinsurance" was $600. What made it especially galling was that the hospital was literally six blocks away. Six blocks! But I hadn't been…

Is it famewhoring if it's the sort of thing non-famous people do? It's not the attention-seeking posts that annoy me — hell, everyone's looking for attention on Twitter, that's what social networking is for — but the self promotion clothed as education (she's teaching people about yoga!).

I used work in fine jewelry, and MAN there were a lot of customers who assumed that 1) my primary goal was to rip them off and 2) the only way to avoid being ripped off was to go on the offensive, quiz me about a bunch of random shit in an attempt to trip me up, and generally pretend to know a lot more about fine…

Champagne boring? Never! It's fizzy and fun and delicious. Vodka and red bull makes you think splitting a dose of E three ways and listening to dub step all night is a good idea, but champagne leads to madcap adventures like skinny dipping and drinking out of your shoe (FACT!, see below). No one ever enjoyed vodka and…

I think people ignored you because street puking — like spitting and peeing — is just another bodily function that one is occasionally confronted with when going about one's business in public. When an activity that normally takes place in the bathroom occurs on a city thoroughfare, it seems best for both actor and…

Fair enough! First, you are definitely not a jerk. Second, it's true you can't help what you find attractive, but that "Why do I care?" question is key. Body hair on women is a hot-button topic because it's so entwined with our cultural standards for femininity and cleanliness and "normal". It's impossible talk about…

Well, the hair on your head is also a trap for sweat and stink, but most of us aren't interested in removing that for odor control.