This is the shopping list of someone who has just come into a lot of dough. They buy crap, lots of it, so they can rid themselves of as much cash as fast as possible. Then, they have nothing.

These are Chokes, Chinese Mokes and have nothing in common with the real thing. Bah humbug...

75 plate on the Pug says Paris.

Paramoke was originally intended to be pushed out of aircraft with a parachute attached. The 10 inch wheels proved it’s downfall. Once 13 inch wheels were fitted in Oz they were a success. 1970's slogan in Oz - Moking is not a wealth hazard.

That camera could see.... into the past!

“Australian police officers near Gold Coast” - it is THE Gold Coast.

But I doubt I’d buy it.

Back section lifts up for access.

She is.

I find customers often tell lies about what they have been told, especially if they’ve done something stupid. They rarely listen...

After 20 years of travelling from Australia yearly to Pebble Beach I decided that last year would be my final trip for a while. It has just become too expensive (AUD $1000 for 2 PB tickets), even the reasonable hotels have started gouging, far too much traffic between events make it impossible to see more than a…

If it happened in Australia it would take 5 years and cost $54 billion.

From memory, I had to order comfort seats too so we could have cooling seats. Different market may make options choice difficult.

I rather like the high gloss finish instead of open pore. Audi have aluminium inlays within an open pore option, I convinced a chap to order this option for his SQ5 and it looked a treat. Only one I ever saw ...

What the hell is horse mucus?

Get yourself a Karcher, they cost five bucks these days, spray detergent in a squirt bottle, flash the wand over it to foam it up and away you go! Minimises scratches in the paint, especially on black. I use a citrus based detergent without any drama.

I can’t read lips but words were exchanged. I really can’t imagine what would be going through this guy’s mind when he thought it would be okay to bring his bike down. Hopefully he’s been shamed into realising he’s a douche.

In Oz we have Gumtree - known as Scumtree. Full of illiterate fools advertising their stolen treasures. “Will you swap my gameboy for your Bentley” and the like are common responses.

Yes, smokes are so highly taxed that the end cost is around $40 a packet. They are in locked cabinets in stores and not allowed to be on display. Folk still want to smoke though. Funny, I don’t know anyone who smokes...