I could tell you some stories...

IT WAS A CATCH

Barry, are you insinuating that the Cardinals won....

Are you really gonna do this for every Cardinals win this season? Really?

If I were a coach and my team drew a London game, I would fake cancer and skip the trip.

Sadly, he had no idea what to do when he reached third base

Barry, articles about Canadian hockey fans in Toronto nonplussed with the product, are for November.

Had to quickly comment on the lamp switch thing and you’re way off. I’ve got a lamp in my living room that is a touch activated lamp. All you have to do is tap a metal part of the lamp to turn it off/on. So awesome.

As a Jets fan, I’ve suffered a great many indignities, from the Buttfumble, to Tebowmania, to Brett Favre’s penis.

As you say, though, these events are not random. They are byproducts of our terroristic foreign policy, which has caused relentless misery around the world and (surprise) come back to bite us in the ass. But people don’t seem very interested in fixing that.

Diner: “Can I have the double bacon cheeseburger, fries, beer and the injured player walk-through special please.”

Waiter: “Would you like the special teams player injury or can I interest you in upgrading to a starter?”

Man, that’s a good way to get yourself Siouxed.

BOTHANS?!?! THIS AGAIN!!?!?!!! Haven’t we gone over this enough?!

On the other hand, whoever gave you your seventieth star is a long way from neat.

Neat.

I’d like to hear more about these 6-9's being rammed down our throats, please.

I didn’t bother to read the article, but there’s no need for name-calling. Jeff Fisher is doing the best he can.

You shut your whore mouth!

I’m conflicted, too. I hate the shit out of Ortiz, but dude is spot-on here.