Learning from Jm J. Bullock, every Monroe now protects himself from harmful risks.

Actually this doesn't really mean a lot for the Redskins' trademark. There are a number of other entities that had a trademark using "Redskins" that have already been denied.

The snow swirled around him as he approached the intersection. It was bitterly cold, so cold that even the simplest thoughts came sluggishly. Going back was not an option. There was nothing behind but an overwhelming emptiness. All he could do was go forward until it was time to make his choice. That choice would set…

"Suspended for XTC" is pretty bad, but still much better than "suspended, from Joy Division."

What an idiot! First you win the Heisman then you pop some ex.

Given that what she said was pretty daft, good thing I came here to read all these refreshing comments.

Erg is my spirit animal.

The only thing that needs to snap tonight is folks' willingness to say stupid shit like this.

I'm figuring that you're just doing a little pickin' at the Jezebel ladies. Yeah, they've got some overbearing folks over there who have a tendency to go over the top sometimes. But they've also got many, many intelligent folks that are aware of the dangers they face and how difficult it is to get a conviction in this…

Lovie: [Sees monkeys approaching]

Old? Piffle. In '59 KC Jones worn #25 for the Celtics because 26 hadn't been invented yet.

And Jordan only wore 23 to remind him of the rules of Blackjack. Presaged his future gambling prowess.

LeBron liked the experience so much he decided to apply for his own gun permit. However, his application was denied on the grounds the NBA has already given him a license to carry.

"Rise and fire!" — Gus Johnson's last words as he broadcasts his own execution.

This is very much the dumbest shit I have read in my life.

[pencils Nate Robinson and a 3-man landmine in the finals bracket of my 'most explosive thing under 6 feet' challenge]

Joseph Finn is Murray Chass.

"Oh boy.. Half naked Andrew in the back of that last one.. He looked damn good though."

Announcer: An ambidextrous shooter of birds! More powerful than a mule's kick! Not quite able to leap a row of fans in a single flounder!

I think you may be onto something here. "Sports News without Access, Favor, or Discretion" is kinda tired. "A Hub for People to Say Shitty Things" is way better.