Do I need to feel connected to enjoy sex?

This has been a long time coming and I’m glad she’s fighting back. #TeamArtistsMakingMoreOnTheirRecordsThanTheRecordLabelExecs.

I know my old high school will tackle this show, and the results will be just like that video, only with a higher production value.

Oh there were tons of them on tumblr declaring they could rap “Satisfied” and “Guns and Ships” better than Renee and Daveed, respectively. Few offered proof and the ones that did were kidding themselves.

I wonder if there are federal violations in shipping human bones across state lines.

I gotta wonder what “specifically Black stories” Empire is telling because my Black ass sure as fuck doesn’t recognize most of the nonsense that goes down on that show.

Yeah, I’m too Black to chance that shit.

What about Handicapped Privilege? They get all those great parking spots! And LGTBQA Privilege? They get their own flag!

She’s right: weed is great for pain like cramps but I’m one of those who can’t smoke and then function like a normal person. I don't want to get high, I just want my uterus to stop trippin'.

But those call sheets favor White people, so they are totally fair and logical. The audience can relate better to a White person than they can a PoC. It’s just science! You can't cast a Black person in a period piece because they'd just be slaves, and you don't want that, right? Besides, roles should go to the best…

Because the hallmark of a great leader is never thinking about major political issues until someone with a tv camera asks you.

Da fuq...?

Why would you make fun of what someone orders at a restaurant? How old are you, Mindy?

Can we bring back apostroph’d words? Pretty please? English already doesn’t make any fucking sense anyway.

Same. I hate that many stores in my city have started charging for bags, because I usually have to walk out holding the merchandise and keep my receipt in plain view. I even wave it in the air at the security checkpoint if there is one. No one is gonna shoot me in the back of the head over this bottle of juice!

This is the darkest of the darkest timeline. The goatees are optional.

When a Muslim player prays, he gets fined. When a QB dances, he gets fined (and called a gang member). When a Black player writes a tribute to their dead father on their face, he gets fined.

I’d forgotten how punchable his face is.

“Can I get a room started for you?” is a standard sales/customer service question.

I'm trying to to remember the last time a Target worker asked me anything and failing. If that's really store policy then every Target I've been to is lacking.