The mind, it wants closure. And some will believe anything to get it, often to the detriment of the species. Weird paradox.

Not today, red fern. Not today.

thank you!

Shouldn’t there be a porn olympics, either in addition to, or maybe instead of, an awards event? I mean what exactly are the objective guidelines in the Best Double Penetration Award? Wouldn’t feats of strength and endurance be just as (or more) impressive?

Aye, then.

You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose: but you can't pick your friend's nose. Found that out the hard way.

Is it, though?

Classic Cory.

That Cory, he’s a cyber-squatting genius!

There’s a couple starting around the 40 second mark (she’s in a checked dress), and it’s hard not to see a little Kendrick Lamar in the dude’s bodywork. I wish I could dance :(

Atlanta really keeping it close; is today the day Carolina finally falls to 13 and 2?

IT’S JUST THE TV GRAMPA ;)

You’d think “All I Want For Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth” would be the go-to holiday hockey fight song, but here we are. God bleth uth, everyone.

It speaks nightshade. Like a pod person. Resistance is fungal.

Do engineers get sad when brilliant developments like this inevitably end up in porn applications?

After all that and they’re playing at Chop Suey? That’s kind of funny.

I used to try to subtly invite myself over to my childhood’s version of you to play with his similarly vast collection of SW toys (his dad was an applestacker at a grocery chain store, so thay had scads of all the good sugary cereals and salty snacks I wasn’t allowed by my crunchy parents), but every time he would see…

Hilarious. Global anticipation is breaking minds.

“Black guy”