But that's the way an effective justice system works. Everyone, no matter how horrible they are, deserves representation and a fair trial.

Better late than never, and most definitely should've posted this story sooner but here it goes. I do promise this will make you smile.

Is George Zimmerman like one of those television serial killers who Wants to Be Caught? I almost feel sorry for him. He is clearly doing EVERYTHING POSSIBLE to go to prison, why won't someone just send him to prison?!?

That obituary was a disgrace, and got the thrashing it deserved on Twitter and in other media (The Australian is a Murdoch paper) yesterday. My fav response with this article imagining the obits of male writers if they were subjected to the same treatment as women.

Every time I write about her, people question the sincerity of my devotion to Marilyn Hagerty.

Are those his testes that she's wearing as earrings?

I would be all for this IF they would instead get these people eating healthy food. But since she just basically wants to take a giant dump on the disabled and elderly, she can go to hell.

Whenever I start thinking the world is getting too classy for my taste, I just cruise Craig's List and instantly feel much better.

I mean... I once took a hamster to the vet when it looked like she was in distress, which it turns out she was. I shelled out about $150 to have her suffering relieved. I don't think that's too irrational, I think it was the kind thing to do for the poor little animal that was in my care.

Updated tips from Fox News

At least it didn't happen in Tennessee. The deceased would be tried and imprisoned.

See, but it's not just dirt. It's like months worth of grime, sweat, oils, and muck stuck all over him. He would smell so bad. The hair is like the icing on that nasty beautiful cake.

Fuck em. Burn em down. Burn the frats all down. Nationally, no more frats. Fuck you all if you were in one.

If we're calling out disturbing details: "Grab IT'S leg" stands out to me. Horrific.

Good for John Hodgman. Fuck Uber. They've made San Francisco extra intolerable right now. Ashton Kutcher, sit down and shut the fuck up.

This was me while reading this story:

I usually just go with this: