Welcome, Rebecca. Penguin Lust is a real thing, and now you are one of us. We are loud as fuck, and now you know why.
Awwww, don’t fix it! I like Coke Maroney. Let’s make it a running joke.
Congrats! You got a insane stalker. You’re a real internet person now.
CEO of Bustle here. Rebecca actually left voluntarily to write for Jezebel and write an upcoming book, Good Things Happen to People You Hate, after I accidentally stapled a bunch of listicles to my forehead. The listicle stapling thing isn’t related, I’m just still trying to pull them off.
As a straight lady, almost twice her age, I can not allow this to happen. I need to believe I still have a shot.