Jesus Fucking Christ that was good. I'm retiring. *Pulls up comfy blanket and watches an old people show. Presumably, something on CBS*

Despite their efforts, they'll never make a monkey out of me.

Nuts and gum together at last.

White people have it the HARDEST! When was the LAST time i got a brake for being WHITE? What if i started a WHite Pride day? id be a racist! Wheres WHITE ENtertainment Television! every BLACK and MINIRITY in USA gets a brake just for beng black. DemonRats would love for a hardworking USA CITIZEn like my self to be…

Not with President Trump in office!

Dikachu has undersold you by $15,000.

I think I'm in safe waters here. It's a good show and she's an attractive woman eating chicken wings.

You know way more about this dude than I do. My knowledge ends with hats.

You can have him. But, only while he wears one of his silly hats.

Have you seen You're the Worst? I think you'd like the episode where Lindsay's face is covered in wing sauce and she's taking sexy photos for a dating app.

He can't wait for the pilot of the Inspector Gadget reboot.

She just looks better with some weight on her. She's like Al Roker in that way. She was disconcertingly thin in Speed Racer which I think spoiled what was an otherwise cute haircut for her.

Her head really does seem that it needs a more ample frame for support. I'm with you on this one.

The rest of the chair can be used to store your various alcoholic beverages to be consumed while watching said program.

Matt Damon's final cognizant moment before gasping his last breath is realizing that people think he looks like an old baby.

My right hand has never taken a call during sex. Lefty, on the other hand…

A Xenomorph will burst forth from Matt Damon's chest while promoting the movie on Kimmel.

They used Google to translate it into German and then back into English. That's the most reliable method of doing such things. We can only assume that this is a direct quote word for word.

Women, always looking for something Xtra.

You added a couple of sentences after I had made my joke. I really feel bad that that happened to you. I hope no hard feelings as I really appreciate your posts and think that you add much to the conversation. Specifically you can reference many things that I haven't seen, but wish that I had.