Ha, you wrote 1500+ words, and I’M thinking too hard? :)

Just embarked on a new-ish relationship (known her for over half a year but been “together” for the past month, almost exactly). She expressed surprise that I had never sent women flowers and said that she does like them. But, some worrying factors:

5 minutes? Who has the time freezing powers now?

Hell, you could do things like paying your bills to taking yourself on a nice little trip to Colombia

Outside the Lines reports that numerous NFL teams were aware of the incident, and it affected Enemkpali’s draft stock.

I too thought it was a transgender at first glance, but I don’t really have a problem with the headline. That’s why you read the article, no? It’s no “Chink in the Armor” after all, and it actually does detail what happened in the story, so...eh?

Bingo! +1 deception

Really telling too, the stuff about his first step/needing a bit of a head start to drive. Another “Never thought of it but of course” realization. I miss Agent Zero. Wish he hadn’t thrown his career away.

ZODIAC MOTHERFUCKER is a national treasure. Why is Deez Nuts getting play for a presidential nomination when ZODIAC is clearly the only person who can make sense of the problems facing our nation? Or maybe even the entire world.

You must have the wrong drinking buddies/habits if you think it’s not worth it. Or else, you’re on duty at NORAD and need to be at your top mental and physical condition to do your job.

Maybe they were angry BECAUSE they were down by 84 runs. Seems pretty petty to try to check someone else’s emotional response to his own slump.

Dear Yankees,

Ouch, I’m going to need to go to the trauma center after catching the backdraft of that sick burn

You’ll think of something, and then proudly bring it to your boss, and your boss will say, “Yeah no, we can’t do that. And we thought of that already.” And then you will never think of another idea ever again.

That “Steel Defense” video exists and I officially don’t believe in God anymore.

But...wait...the Nazis were Christians...So, that Tweet means Curt is anti-Christian, right? Or am I getting this wrong? It’s so hard to parse through all the dissonance.

The problem, Murphy noted, is that owners don’t want to lose the revenue of a full game, since they charge full prices for preseason.

Blah blah blah you go ahead and donate your own money to create a scholarship for walk-ons and refuse publicity for it. Nothing’s stopping you, except the time you spend on internet commenting.

We all know he has the spunk to make a real difference in Washington.