...United by forty years of deregulation and self-absorbed voting, two millennials finally have enough and create a computer virus that deletes all wealth from every bank in the world.

I wish this exchange had included a bet to pay the other a million doll hairs if proven wrong.

“Your gun is digging into my hip."

Guessing there was no VAR in that Vegas hotel.

Nothing says I care about the unborn more than cramming a Glock into the waistband of your makeshift maternity wear.

Trump: "That's totally false. Also, Tiffany who?'

Woah, you're totally correct. Just read Jaffer's Wikipedia page. I'm a dope :)

Babos’ vocalizations have got to be the weirdest in the sport.

Good call!

Get ready, Iowa. Bernie’s gonna rock out with his cauc’ out.

I’m pretty sure “fallen angels” means demons or that girl from the Poison video.

Chip Kelly, huh? Do they even have Chick-fil-A in Los Angeles?

I thought this was the ACLU making the demand at first. Just rightwing turds, carry on.

Looked like he kept both toes inbounds. I’d call that a catch.

Hour 1: All ten candidates debate/yell at/interrupt each other.

I’m already paying him through the nose...hey-oh!!!

Christ. My dealer won’t even drive to my apartment.

I’m willing to bet the creators of Rick and Morty, Big Mouth, and South Park would do at least an hour on Shaq having a tiny wang in contrast to his enormous body...pro bono.