If Foster looked a bit more like Eric Clapton, it would be perfect.

Hear hear. If my wife understood this, she would be a lot happier.

I’m really not that bad, once you get to know me.

I used to know a karaoke regular who always sang this song while nursing a glass of Hennessy.

From John Irving’s “A Widow For One Year”: Never cut your wheels when waiting to make a left turn.

Deadspin: Come for the dick jokes, stay for the... more dick jokes.

I thought he was talking about the former Expos pitcher.

Neither the donkeys nor the elephants are coming to save us. We’re on our own.

Either Thriller (my favorite album) or Aja (the best album I’ve ever heard).

Either Thriller (my favorite album) or Aja (the best album I’ve ever heard).

I’m a fan of all three, sad to see any of them go.

I’m a fan of all three, sad to see any of them go.

I’ve conceded that this year is a shitshow, but come on, quit fucking with me. Leave Ric alone.

A more one-sided relationship than he has with his favorite football team.

Guess I know what I’m doing tonight: Getting drunk and playing with this Google Doodle.

I actually forgot this jackass was on vacation. Probably because there’s been no change in daily patterns.

You’re so articulate/well-spoken

I moused over expecting The Daily Mail.

That’s my favorite too. It works every time.

McDowell’s career starts with a half note, followed by a rest.

We’ve all seen New Jack City, right?

Only half?