I'm about to start dating again and god I really really don't want. Like if my parents weren't crazy I would so be down for an arranged marriage. I feel like your close trusted friends should do the first round pick and you pick it up from there. Anyway I date men, with all the "no is just a negotiation bullshit that…

"I'm a Whiny Pissbaby" is the best, I'm dying.

Tell me again how simple it is to just tell a guy no. When someone literally has to fake their death to get rid of you, maybe its time to reevaluate your life. She's nicer than me because I would've been all " I faked my death to get away from a Stage 5 clinger like you!"

No lie I literally just saw his sex tape, and ya I totally get it now. I mean I got it before but now I really really get it. God bless and keep you Colin Farrel.

I think the fact they're pimping the soundtrack so hard speaks volumes.

Maybe I'm just really lazy but wouldn't it have just been easier to legit marry and breed with the man. This just sounds so complicated, plus 10 years is a long time. *and everyone involved in the con is a giant shit bag.

I know this movie is going to be turd, based purely on the source material. But the way they are pimping this soundtrack, makes me think that this is going to be a festering turd. Just hot garbage all the way and this is literally a frantic attempt to get as much cash as possible. Shit they didn't pimp the Twilight…

Reason #27472 to cut the speeches out.

Wedding:nope reception: hell fucking yes!! I intend to get loud and obnoxious so who cares. Ive always viewed a reception as cake/dance time anyway.

I always loved them for this poor kid/broken home anthem.

Debbie is his mother I believe. I know pull out the smelling salts Eminem has issues with his mother.

You know I for the a while her sentencing aggravated the shit out of me. It must be really awesome to have a judge be so considerate of two criminals. Of course you can spend the holidays with your family, and of course you can go one at a time so your children have some sort stability during this time. Someone please…

Ok so I'm an old ass virgin and average about 1-2 orgasms a day. I'm legitimately worried about when I finally do have sex, if I can't orgasm with an actual human. Like what if years of getting myself off, means my brain can't add another human into the equation.

I have been saying this for years. Harry and Ginny had ZERO chemistry in the books and -46 degrees in the movies. Shit Harry and Draco had better chemistry.

Can I Live? - Nick Cannon:

Come on let's be real,the handler knew and was like "fuck this bridezilla yolo!"

So they have the same policy as Nigeria "What? People care about this?" I'm gonna take a guess at how this plays out. Um nothing happened, ok fine something did happen, we're totes investigating what happened, we have a lead, wait for Kim K (or any celebrity really) to get naked, and go back to not giving a shit.

I honestly thought that was the deal. Maybe I'm wrong but I thought after 6 months/24weeks you needed a not from your doctor. At least that's what that movie Away We Go taught me.

Hey hey that nice couple small and large intestine deserve some props too. Can we through colonics in the bullshit bonfire as well? I mean does it take one rich idiot to make something a thing. Let this non medical stranger shove a hose up your ass. That'll be $200.

I was literally thinking that's driver's license good. Where you look pretty and cute and by some sort of magic voodoo that prettiness makes it to a picture. Many moons ago my license pic was so great then I had to take another one and now I look like I just escaped.