Dad?

“I’m A Pussy, You’re A Terrible Hockey Player” is my favourite Death From Above 1979 album.

Maybe I am the minority but I prefer women who don’t like makeup. The excuse that makeup helps build confidence is a lie in every way imaginable.

I think the best Star Wars tech would be teleporters, you know, just like Kirk and Picard used to get places.

This is what Mark Zuckerberg has also done. It’s all really good support for the notion that people should not be able to accumulate this much wealth to begin with. 

No one really cares what cops want to do, they care about what cops actually do.

If their partners are going to bitch about interrupted marketing plans in the face of a 6.7 earthquake, then their partners can go fuck themselves.

So I just googled who this guy is and this is what immediately came up.

Sometimes I wish my life was so comfortable that I could see a group of people standing up for themselves and think “oh, how annoying.”

Was it hanging on a loop of sorts, right there to be jostled sackward? Was it stuck straight in the waistband, with the drill bit resting gently upon his testicles?

I wish there was a feature that popped up when people make the same comment that’s already been made 1,000 times and contributes nothing to the conversation but your own take.

I disagree that the tweet is transphobic.

This comment isn’t intelligent.

writer: *list of reasons why something is transphobic*

Not recorded in the body cam footage were the words to his partner as he jumped back in the cruiser.

As anyone who’s been to Xi’an knows, the Chinese have owned Warriors of Klay for thousands of years.

I usually have to go to White Castle for my horse beef.

OR the husband she married at 18 was an abusive asshole and she felt overwhelmed with 2 kids by 24.

♫ God bless America... land that I luff... dah dah dah dah, hmm hmm hmm, to the thing with the thing over there. Hmm hmm hmm hmm, hmm hmm prairies, hey Melania, is that snow? God bless America... la la la no. ♫

Not a dong, but definitely a huge boner.