I wasn’t sure your comments could get any stupider, but you did it. Congratulations.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAH “allowed.”

It’s fucking ridiculous. I was in the trauma ER years ago with gallons of liquor and grams of blow in my system; I left with a prescription for 100 Percocets.

What’s the friction coefficient of the incline’s surface?

I’m all for this plan in a lot of instances but my dog wouldn’t do well without A/C. My old Rottweiler loved NYC summers because I would fill the bathtub with cold water and let her splash around to her heart’s content, so we lived without A/C most of the time. My current Husky is not much a fan of water and very much…

I was watching an Indians game last week and I actually said, “Damn, Marlon Byrd looks fucking huge.” My mind doesn’t immediately go to steroids as much as it used to, but Marlon got large in his old age, and not in a “middle-age spread” kind of way.

I kept expecting it to be #1. A glaring omission.

So, wait, he’s blaming Obama for this? How much you want to bet the other guy is doing the same thing?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHA “new scam.” This has been around for 30 years.

Still playing the game the right way, Tonaayyyyyyy.

I’m glad this article could affirm your smug sense of superiority, though I imagine you can manage to get that little boost from just about anything, right?

So, having a clearly retarded person (you would have to be to take anyone’s final exam for only $20) take his final exam for him raised this “student”-athlete’s grade a full letter? From what, Q to P? I’d say I’m gonna report it to Coach Saban (come on, Alabama is full of retards), but there’s no way he’d even suspend…

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAAHAHAA I am so so glad this hot take was voted out of the greys.

Ok. PayPal does own Venmo (and yet there’s no way to directly transfer from Venmo to your PayPal account so you can, y’know, actually use that money, which is super helpful).

There’s always money to be made. I literally texted a friend yesterday about a music festival we both wanted to go to “If money is your only obstacle to the two of us doing this, it is not an obstacle.” Good friends will pay you back in far more valuable ways.

Yeah, if it doesn’t all balance out in the end, one way or another, you’re not really friends.

Yes, I realize that Venmo adds extra steps to making my money actually useful. That is precisely my complaint.

Plants from PayPal? I take it you have no awareness of who owns Venmo?

My beef with Venmo is that it’s completely useless for anything but interpersonal transactions. I can send money to my friends with plenty of other apps/wallets/whatever, and also actually use them to purchase goods and services, as well.

Sorry, Matt, but if you’re gonna pimp this “Dark Knight” bullshit, you really have to back it up, and you’ve been hot, wet garbage this year.