I’m certain Putin is trying to wreck my Dry January, just kidding I’ll never give up the sauce

“Brought to you by Exxon- because Buckwheat would’ve wanted it that way.”

I dunno- game recognize game. But maybe omeday war will be obsolete, and they’ll look back and wonder why couldn’t control our jingoistic amygdalas. Until then- carry on, troops

The flawed(?) algorithms between Tom of Finland and this Nazi twink, lawdy...

Grimes seems deathly aware in the track above of co-opting any cultures besides the operatic or the elvish and dives into to both with gusto. Some apologies to Paul Simon’s Rhythm of the Saints, [hand motion]

If the founding fathers wanted one thing—besides not 40% of the country endorsing a Russian appointed king—it was for our “cyber, Barron is good with the cyber” security systems to be ahead of the Bulgarians’. Congrats, we’re ahead of the Bulgarians and maybe by not so much

You know, if it is proven that Stella has trafficked in child porn or participated in any form of white slavery then she should have the book thrown at her, and be shivved in prison. Someone should look into that, in case it’s true. Just sayin’

But in what condition, though.

If hundreds of thousands of years of human birth order is to be believed...

No way, he is clearly more Ruffalo adjacent why am I saying this

“Abusive females””disgusting macho stigma”

Jesus, Joe- the last thing this campaign needed was another black eye.

Weep not for Kimba, for he has gone on to meet Geoffrey Jr. in that Great Toys-R-Us in the sky. And, yea—most importantly— he’s finally free from the soul-crushing tyranny that is: Skyline Chili

Please please please let perfect be the enemy of the good #winningstrategies

“If you don’t like the news, then go make some of your own”

Machete, huh? Sounds exhausting, as well as a good way to get shot. 

Lol enjoy your diabetes and stolen data  🐑🐑🐑🐑🐑🐑🐑🐑🐑🐑🐑🐑🐑🐑

I don’t like the sound of any of that. 

The trick is to turn Gen Z against Millenials before they come for us- divide and conquer!

True, but a good faith effort—even if just a symbolic icebreaker—being shat upon by preznit fuckface is noteworthy unto itself. But fuck that guy, he’s not bowing out for your very good reasons, he’s doing it because he and the people he represents are dumb dickheads and/or those who stand to gain by not helping the…