Oh, I got it, but the joke still didn’t land. Sorry.

I’m mystified as to why they chose a sea lion for that comic. Sea lions are fucking awesome.

Buddy, you’re not the top of this “thread branch.” This is:

more the auto mechanic, plumber, handyman type

It won’t require shaming “language,” reality will be shaming enough for people like you who will quickly realize you don’t have the skills or discipline to survive at poverty level. Your present “productivity” is due to circumstance far more than you want to admit. It won’t scale down the way you are fantasizing.

Is the Max Landis story ever going to break? The old story keeps getting resurrected in the promo feed, teasing me, then nothing new.

It’s such an ignorant analogy, I hardly know where to start making fun of it. I guess with — if Hollywood devoted the same level of resources and skill to exploring the foreign markets they hope to exploit as the energy companies do to shale plays, they’d make better movies and more money.

Cresting. Kennedys.

In this comment, we quietly celebrate Bobby giving us a preview of what will be found at an ONTD link.

Yeah, there’s a difference between embarrassing money-grubbing relative and whatever it is this lady is up to. There’s a control/abuse vibe to her that makes me want the entire media to put her on Ignore.

It’s the doubling down that’s killing me. Also, Horshack laughed at everything.

Hell no he wasn’t. Kerry was the favored candidate from the beginning. Dean angered the establishment with his anti-war stance; the last thing they wanted was a centrist Dem pointing out how insane that Iraq boondoggle was. They didn’t want opposing the AUMF to be seen as a legitimate position because all the…

Your devoted troll hunting is compromising your ability to see light in the world.

That is the shadiest possible picture to include with this article. I can’t even focus on the waste of it all because I’m distracted by the particulars of Trump playing golf. Has anyone witnessed him playing a full round? I’m skeptical he could swing a club that many times without injuring himself.

:(

Sweet Valley High always described the twins as a “perfect size six” and this is the standard embedded in my head over 30 years later.

I’ve always wondered that about morning host selection as well. I imagine one of those opinion testing operations where they approach women at the mall and ask them who they would prefer, with the choices being Matt Lauer-type, homeless guy, and the high school wrestling coach who also barks his way through teaching…

In the spirit of this joke, I would like to announce that I have been spending my nights in the studio practicing and am prepping my debut rap album for second quarter ‘18.

I suggest going the other direction and embracing the entitlement to be frumpy.