Female air marshals.

stopping a small child from implanting

It reminds me of that state senator (one of the Carolina's, maybe?) who proposed an amendment to an abortion law. The law was that any woman seeking an abortion had to get a transvaginal ultrasound. So she added the amendment that any man seeking a Viagra prescription had to get a colonoscopy.

Dear State of Arkansas: file child abuse charges against these scumbags posthaste, because isolating a child for hours on end IS abuse.

I come from a HUGE family, half of which still live in Oklahoma. Yeah, you know this is about you, You. There was a rift in the 50s over a bunch of money from some business endeavor and that story itself is insane, but it came up at my cousin's wedding when I was 15. She had specifically stated NO FLASKS on the…

I was babysitting when a kid bit my hand and as I jerked it away I slapped him in the face.

I'm told that when I was two or three, I was bobbling down the hallway in our house, drooling and eating my fist. (I was one of those babies that spent the first four years with at least one fist in my mouth. There are photos to prove this.)

Unless "the quiet game" looks like this, then no, they really don't.

A guy I worked with told me he was splitting wood in the back yard when his only child, then 4 years old, came up behind him, within axe back-swing range. He told the kid to stand farther back, took a couple more swings, then caught sight of movement in the corner of his eye. Kid was right back in the danger zone. He…

AHAHAHA a friend of mine who comes from a very religious background reluctantly went to see Passion of the Christ while pregnant as fuck. She apparently got herself a jumbo popcorn and set up camp with it balanced on her giant belly. People around her were giving her dirty looks, because I guess you aren't supposed…

Loving this. A few users are endless fonts of great #CPACQ tweets, such as Jayelle:

omg i see this gif in a whole new light now

Mutts are always so much cuter than purebreds! Not that I'm biased. Not even a little bit.

The Whole Wheat Toast is the best, because it was so obvious once I read it fully, but at that same time I had no idea of the punchline until the end.

My reaction to the story

A real quick one -

I am a working cook, as well as an instructor at a culinary school in Canada. I regularly reference BCO in class, trying to prepare my students for the unbelievable fuck-wittery waiting for them out in the 'real' world. These poor kids have no idea what awaits them...

When will the media understand that George married way the fuck up and that he is Amal's trophy husband???

ETA: I can't even imagine what it's like for her to go to those Hollywood award shows with George, knowing the calibre of class she is accustomed too. She looked annoyed and out of place in every shot of them I…