While these aren't massacres nor at weddings, here is a list on Wikipedia of Americans killed by celebratory gunfire.

Plaxico Burress shot himself in the hip at a club.

My thoughts exactly. There should be a dedicated fence clearing crew.

Create a burner account?

Throw on a black fur cape and you are a member of the watch. Grey and you are a wildling. In either case, you will likely be sweating to death at your party.

Really? I've been put off by the price of Hudson Bay products.

It takes 30 years for your whiskey to be drinkable...

I wonder if she hangs out with gay men and they refer to her as beard.

I'd never thought of using the dessicant packs. The air gap gets moisture every winter and eventually turns to mold that needs scrubbed come spring.

I bought my wife one of the emergency bras. She luckily never had to deal with a nuclear or chemical attack.

I was unaware of San Francisco being 'cold' in the summer. I would have figured Maine or the Dakota area would be the coldest.

I enjoy the benefits section of the website.

The londoncyclist.co.uk site is hijacked and is serving Fake AntiVirus.

Ah, how could you barrel age Chartreuse?!?

Yeah, where were the religious nuts arguing it was the sign of the beast?

Is that the one at the Studio Ghibli museum in the Tokyo area?

I thought they were from that band as well. I assumed that meant Beats By Dre were doing headphones for fake bands like them and Spinal Tap.

My wife wants a BB 10. She hates all things Apple and doesn't like her Android phone. Her various BB devices all just worked.

I agree. Shallow and pedantic.

Unable due to a medical condition or unable due to a lack of skill?