Tom is saving that for A Fistful of Shuriken, his column on ninja movies that will debut after this one.

COTFY

By the by, I love that The GOP and The Puppet now want to arm teachers. They spent the last 40 years calling us lazy, uncaring, and incompetent, yet now we’re armed to save everyone (no body armor, by the by). Seriously, thanks, white people, you fucked us all hard by voting for The GOP.

My thoughts exactly, and it’s one of the most prevalent reasons we’re in this horrific mess right now. Journalists have become less interested in the truth than they are in fucking clicks and ratings. Shame on every last one of them.

The fact that we’re applauding teenagers for asking hard questions goes to show that the adult journalists have not been asking hard questions for years.

“I guess that was the short program,” Tessa said, watching the smoke rise from the end of her cigarette.

She is also now pregnant.

the sex tape is going to do better than Kim k

The nearest orthopedist.

I’ll believe Andrew Luck is healthy when I see him play, and maybe not even then

“How is this worse than what Loria was doing for the last several years?”

Come on, you’re better than this! My wife and I play in a bowling league together and we’re not fucking.

Barry, you prude, you’re acting like you’ve never stuffed a platonic friend’s muff in your face then transitioned her into a hurricarana in the name of competition before.

I’m on level 4 here but hurtling toward 6

Yes. German Madrazo. However here are some key differences:

The Mexican cross-country skier that came last was nearly double the leader’s time, sure, but it’s one of those things that comes off differently when you’re talking about someone who’s working hard to scrape together qualifying times vs gaming the system like this.

I think the problem here is because it’s a scored…

When my partner and I get married, we’ve promised each other our first dance will be to “No Children.” It’s a love song for us, because it’s the best anti-love/non-breakup song ever, and because it’ll make at least four of our relatives’ heads explode.

I came here looking for this comment. There is a Mountain Goats song for every feeling. I was in the middle of my worst breakup when I first heard “No Children,” and it still gets me through all my darkest times.

The truly vicious thing about No Children is that it isn’t a break up song, it’s a goddamned staying together song.