I have no idea where the Drake hate comes from. I like his music and find him adorkably charming. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Is there something legitimately bad about Drake? I’ll say it- Drake is a catch. Somebody ought to snap him up.

Rihanna is still WAY TOO GOOD for Drake, but I guess congratulating her with a billboard is a nice enough gesture. Rihanna’s response only made me love her more though.

Whatever this is, it really misses the mark.

Well, that’s it. To all the assholes badmouthing Brazil about venues collapsing left and right, a zika epidemy, ever athlete being kidnapped and murdered, everybody dying from the water and other bullshit, eat your hearts out! The only relevant incident happened in the imagination of Ryan Lochte.

Team GB a record haul - hooray. That is what happens when people are allowed to train full time and not have to have another job at the same time. National lottery funding everyone. And the velodrome in Manchester kicking it out the cycling.

This is so good I’m crying.

The story he made up was insane. Robbers dressed as cops and he is just “whatever” to a gun in his head. But of course, everyone believed it because after all, it is a “3rd world shithole”, right?

Some men just want to watch the pool turn green world burn.

I was just laughing at the other swimmers being like “It was all Lochte’s idea!” Fair enough, bros, but if we’re honest, you get what you deserve when you accept Ryan Lochte as your idea man.

And I just LOVE how some are surprised that the security guards pulled their guns on four physically overwhelming and highly intoxicated foreigners who were being belligerent and vandalized their property. Isn’t this why the security guards exists in the first place?

Those wing shoes are hideous. Also, I knew he was lying when I saw the interview with Matt Lauer and he said he refused to get down when the guy holding them up at gunpoint told them to do so. I don’t know anyone who would take that time to have a debate with a guy who could end your life in a second. I can’t wait to…

Fuck Ryan Lochte, WE MISS YOU EGR!!!!

The reaction from this story from some Americans has been a mess. The comments in last few posts about Brazil has been awful. Brazil does have a lot of problems, but calling it “3rd world shithole” and other things is just awful.

This is beatiful. Everything is coming into focus. My own journey took me from Lochte believer, to thinking he was robbed while drunk af, to thinking Brazil was angry at him for not remembering details of the robbery bc he was drunk af, to thinking he's a dumbass trying to use a cover story, to thinking he’s a fully…

Amazing that he took the time to re-blue his hair for this trip. Perhaps there was a nefarious threat to US national security in that gas station and he is actually a CIA operative.

I’ve always known Ryan was dumb. Like, properly stupid. But not even in my wildest dreams could I have imagined that he could bring about a full-blown international incident based solely on the sheer intergalactic power of his stupidity.

The illustration. I’m crying.

Ugh, I know a guy who does that for his February birthday. He has like 5 or 6 different events to celebrate himself. One of them he calls the Pajama Jammy Jam, which is basically going to a bar in PJs. This year he was 49, I shudder to think of the levels of narcissism he’ll rise to for his 50th.