The locals are too strung out on oxy

Pinky! I specifically said NOT to Google. Come, dear, and sit shivering in the corner with me.

It took me way too long to get this joke, but when my tiny idiot brain finally got it I guffawed.

Pot, Kettle something something

Jamal Khashoggi would like a word... Oh wait.

Is it the putting children in cages that is actually bad for morale or is it the fact that the fee fees of the CBP are hurt because people disagree with said putting children in cages?

Don’t forget “Corn Pop”! 

SIX deaths-does that even count as a ‘mass’ shooting anymore, or is that just a Tuesday? #priorities

Let’s check in with the children of Flint, since Michigan is showing so much concern for its children. 

Is this Max Stier going to be Kavanaugh’s Hannibal Buress???

Every time I run out of free articles on the NYT website and think I should just bit the bullet and subscribe, they remind me it’s not worth it.

I’m guessing he was also white?

Does that mean Aunt Becky gets 33.33X punishment? 

Oral compass?

The top ones might come out but the bottom ones are allll his. [Do not Google.]

Happy Friday the 13th - thanks for THAT mental image. 

Not enough money in the world to wake up next to those teeth every day.

Ya love to see it.

He has zero sense of humor. 

If they were at all clever they’d be calling them ‘betos’ now.