This is the best comment section in a long, long while…..

Dear god that's brilliant….

Or a banana. Or an orange.

All I Want For Christmas is Booze….

RealDolls.

Cats will suss you out very quickly. One friend adores cats and mine is just all over him when he comes round, yet another, who isn't particularly fond of them but more tolerates them, he'll just go out if they come round and come back when my friend is gone.

If you're going through a 44-pound bag every day then that cat is not well….

Gonna paint your wagon /
Gonna paint it fine /
Gonna use an oil-based paint /
Because the wood is pine!

Sorry, Schwarzenegger's just too old for action pics now, as was shown in Terminator: Genesys. Even granting the conceit of an 'aged' machine, it was still painful to watch at points. Nearly as bad as seeing the remains of Chuck Norris in The Expendables 2. As for Dwayne Johnson, he may have a gap in his schedule…

I bought the DVD and gave a friend the slip with the digital download code on it. He saw the line 'Watch It Anywhere' and read it as 'Watch it Anyway….'

Hey, that's the plot of Collateral Beauty 2!

Quvenzhané Wallis.

Oh jesus, if we've got a pun jar now I'll have to make a standing order….

Caradog W. James is Welsh, and most of this was also shot in Wales. He also made the rather good The Machine in 2013, which seemed like a dry run for Ex Machina and is very worth seeing.

'Palava' is also wonderful. If it isn't in the lyrics of at least three Chaz n'Dave songs I'll be amazed.

Ah…… this isn't the Solange I was thinking of. The other one…..did films…… you clickbait bastards…..

Eh? Oh, I checked and there's no 'a' apparently. Still a great word. Not so much mispronunciation but I find myself unable to say the word 'Aluminium', the British pronunciation. I seem to say 'Alu-minimum', which used to amuse my Mum no end.

Do you even lift, bro?

Obviously a line from an episode of WKRP I never saw…

'I went back to the page to determine which of us was on crack, Amazon or myself.' Brilliant, given me the best laugh of the week.