Au Revoir, Simone!

10/03/08 7:30pm

Well, as you may have read elsewhere, today is my last day as a Defamer. Your Uncle Grambo isn't really the commiserating type, so I'm going to keep this tidy. I'd like to thank everyone on the immediate team during my stay — Mark, Seth, Molls, Molly, Douglas, Stu, Kyle, Nick and Tricia — for contributing their blood,…

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Glen, The Coffee Bean Guy, Weighs In On Tonight's Vice Presidential Debate

10/02/08 8:20pm

Tonight's the night that the shrill harpies who populate The View have been carping about since late August. Yes, that's right, it's the first time the citizens of the United States get to see Sarah Palin in a completely unedited (and mostly unscripted) setting. Being the politically savvy site that we are, we…

Molls Has Some Friendly Advice For Anne Hathaway

10/01/08 7:00pm

If a Family Feud pollster approached you in the street and asked you to name which actress has had the most turbulent 2008 thus far, many of you would likely respond with Anne Hathaway. Heck, just in the last 24 hours, she's had to fend off a from David Letterman and a nasty bit of internet gossip about her . Well,…

After 'Late Night' Cameo, Tina Fey Nearing Goal Of Appearing On Every NBC Show

10/01/08 5:45pm

After the landmark ratings success that was the 2008 Summer Olympics, NBC was anxious to capitalize on the momentum they had built leading into the fall. However, despite all that promotional exposure, Beijing Ben and the NBC team haven't yet been able to convert in the ratings department: , and both saw from…

10/01/08 1:35pm

Stop Us If You Think That You've Heard This One Before: We're all outta jokes at this point, but it is our civic duty to relay to you that the MGM building has been evacuated this morning due to a bomb threat. As you'll no doubt recall, last Friday and also in . And for those of you keeping score at home, the…

Would You Punch A Shark In The Face To Save Your Dog?

Yeah yeah yeah, we know most people around the country are either talking about the failed bailout plan, Sarah Palin or those Somali pirates holding a ship for a $20 million ransom. However, around Defamer HQ, the only thing we've been talking about is that guy to save his beloved rat terrier. As you might expect,…

Putting The Icing On The 'Ace Of Cakes'

Have you been losing sleep trying to figure out why the blogosphere isn't paying Ace Of Cakes any attention? Well, put that 'scrip for Ambien away because tonight you're gonna sleep the sleep of the dead after you watch our very own Molly McAleer give the much-heralded Food Network program some overdue love. Tonight's…

Shia's Coming Out Party

We realize that it's not exactly Monday morning anymore, but we're hopeful that you'll find it in your hearts to forgive us for scrambling a bit at Defamer HQ today. Won't you play along as we recap the weekend in which America finally ditched the outdoors and regained its collective appetite for boxes of Junior Mints…

Paul Newman, Academy Award Winner, Dead At 83

9/27/08 11:30am

Paul Newman, actor and dedicated philanthropist, died yesterday at the age of 83 after a long bout with cancer. The Method trained actor learned his craft at Yale and the Actors Studio and went on to become one of Hollywood's most enduring screen icons, starring in over 65 films such as , , and . However, it wasn't…

Whoopi Goldberg, Master Of Eloquent Political Analysis

· We don't know how long that Whoopi Goldberg has been on The View —we suppose we could look it up, but it's Friday night and we're tired as shit— but nary a day goes by when we don't think to ourselves, "How in tarnation is Whoopi qualified to be de facto leader?" Today's evidence of her ineptitude involved her…

Hugh Hefner's Search For A 'Girl Next Door' Ends Here

Hugh Hefner has had better weeks. In the span of three days, Hef managed to lose not one, not , but of his . But don't feel bad for the doddering old coozehound. After all, we think that we may have found a replacement girl that can quickly step into Holly, Kendra and Bridget's high-heeled shoes. Yes, that's right,…

Ted McGinley, Pathos Personified

· After getting booted from Dancing With The Stars last night, famed '80s Ted McGinley —whose unfortunately high-pitched voice was the only thing separating him from being one of the most dominating leading men of that decade— gave what will soon come to be recognized as the most humiliatingly pathetic concession…

Dear Ryan Seacrest: People Who Live In Barbie Dream Houses Shouldn't Throw Mojitos

When Clay Aiken showed up on the cover of People this week announcing to the world that he is, in fact, a gay American, most of us —— processed the relatively unsurprising news and went about our lives. However, while on the radio this morning, Ryan Seacrest couldn't help getting snarky on his old pal when he…

John Krasinski Vs. Eric Stoltz In A Muppet-Off For The Ages

· Last night on The Late Late Show With Craig Ferguson, John "Leatherheads" Krasinski broke out his heretofore unheralded ability to demonstrate his "Muppet arms." Which, naturally, reminded us of Eric Stoltz's legendary (at least to us) "Muppet walk" from . Whose impression is better? We'll leave that for you to…

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Cloris Leachman Will Sex You Up

· After being ritually abused by cloddish comedians for nearly two hours at the largely laugh-free roast for Bob Saget (save for Norm MacDonald's tremendous bit) a few weeks back, it was good to see Cloris Leachman getting the last laugh on last night. It goes without saying that we were tremendously shocked to…

Molly McAleer Is Also A Lesbian, Also Sad About DJ AM

Today has been quite the day for famous people going on record with their sexual preferences. This morning, we heard the big news about Lindsay Lohan's personal predilections, and this afternoon brought us the glorious news of . Well, we thought it was only fair to continue this grand tradition by exclusively…

Choose Your Own Adventure: Halloween Wigs or Heidi Klum?

When faced with the difficult decision as to whether to watch the Emmys or go to the grocery store last night, our Intrepid Defamer Videographer™ Molly McAleer weighed all of her options carefully before making the final call. As you might expect, there were pros and cons on each side. For instance, the Emmys are only…

Good morning to you, the loyal Defamer reader. A few quick administrative notes to share with you on this Monday morning. First off, Seth is taking a well-deserved vacation this week; while we're all going to miss him, we're happy to announce that Amy Kaufman has agreed to join us for the next two days in a guest…

Check Yourself, Shenae Grimes

Before the first show of the 90210 reboot even aired, Intrepid Defamer Videographer™ Molly McAleer giving her full support to series star Shenae Grimes (aka, Brenda 2.0). But news that Shenae is beginning to transform into Shannen Doherty 2.0 has got this long time Degrassi fan worried. In tonight's installment of To…

Sarah Silverman, Hero To Scorned Women Everywhere

As most of you know by now, Sarah Silverman took home a Creative Arts Emmy on Saturday night for . But rather than rattle off a traditionally dull acceptance speech, she to put the screws to her ex, Jimmy Kimmel, by thanking "the person for who this video was made, who broke my heart, oops ... who... will always have…