I imagine a couple Breitling PAs held him down while another hosed him off.

I actually found that humanizing, at least the sentiment.

Hell, let Dolly be Gertrude. 

I don’t understand this trend of people calling actors or even characters they like “my son”. Just refer to your cat as your son, like a normal person.

Cannibal Witch:

Hurting the People She’s Supposed To Be Hurting

but her e-meals

Bless your heart.

Right, Republicans are never offended by anything.

It sounds like Average Anna has a pretty good time until she gets married and has kids.  That was obviously her mistake.

What did Mitch McConnell do this time?

You see this is a common misconception about Kushner. While he is most certainly inhuman, he is not nosferatu, das wampyr. Were he, he’d be possessed of knowledge gathered over many lifetimes, numerous supernatural and preternatural powers, including command over beasts of the night; and we all know Kushner couldn’t…

The cast of the films people actually watch giving the awards to the films the people forget existed. If the Oscars want to continue to relevant in the future perhaps now is the time to start awarding and recognizing amazing films outside of their wheelhouse. A Black Panther and a Michael B. Jordan nomination would go…

yeah. like he finds her so full of life. like she’s just so.....alive! i’m guessing. is how it came about. it’s kind of cute. a little creepy, but if someone thought i was super warm and lively and full of life and loved being close to me - i’d take it. i can relate to the difference between a vivacious, energetic…

I call BS on Angelina stalking Beckham. Have you heard him talk? He almost makes Posh seem intellectual. Good try tho.

For me it just looks like his face and neck blobs grew a fine layer of pubes.

He looks like he works middle-management at Harrods.

That’s why everything in the Forest was so hostile. They’d just be hanging out, minding their own damn business, and suddenly a pile of shit would rain down on them.

Username checks out. 

What’s wrong with eating a turkey leg?