You forgot your daily Tesla/Elon hate hit paragraph. Here you go:

That’s what you get when you use this super-dangerous Tesla battery technology. Car fires. Never seen before. And I’m sure the Tesla autopilot caused the crash, because crashes never happened before Tesla started putting autopilot in cars. 

Fire! Tesla!…

The paid him more money per season for an extra guaranteed season. This isn’t difficult to figure out.

But they will let the hundred or so hired by the government to do it.

In Soviet Russia, weapons scientists either did their job or sent to the firing squad.

It took two seconds to do an NSA search. It would be one but I misspelled Contrarian the first time.

Yeah, but it’s really Elon Musk’s fault, right? 

You forgot to mention that it’s Elon Musk’s fault. But why don’t you tweet him asking for help? Then totally throw him under the bus. He deserves it. His cars spew all this smog and smoke and set forests on fire. Totally his fault.

Come on gawkerzombie, didn’t you get the memo?

Jizzblizzard? Bullseye. Nazi Flying Saucer aryan myth! Man, you like to think about comics.

You love Hugo Chavez, but hate Elon Musk. Well, I’m bored.

You gawkerdrones really twisted yourselves into pretzels for your Muskclicks this time. Is this journalism? Is this blogging? Is it art? Bodily excretions?

One thing is for sure, hell is other people.

I daresay, old chap, you really dropped my pants with that, what do you call it... meme? Truly the zenith of wordplay. A remarkable achievement of creativity, wit, and candor. I will truly remember that for a spell.

or... not.

The solution to the one-and-done is let the NBA draft and pay rookie scale (or put it into a trust), but the player drafted can play out college ball if the team doesn’t need him to ride pine.

That would let the teams do speculation picks but let the players stay where they want to or need to.

The NCAA gets better…

Me fail read understand. Sacramento drafted him, but the Grizzlies somehow had him, but traded him back to Sacramento, and there was cash and a pick and a d-league guy, but I’m not sure who was dumping what or what was the saddest part, and why was Ranadive bragging about something?

Is that a lukewarm take? Hm. Maybe room temperature. Shall I get you a microwave? Nah, that would just make it an old, stale take that was reheated.

*Okay Factual* Statement*. Hopefully Elon narcissist keeps doing what he’s been doing.... for the rest of his life. You can keep hating. Awwww, does poor wittle Elon have more fame and importance than *Factual Statement? Oh I’m sorry, or was it Factual Statement*? Damn I keep messing that up.

At this point with all the internet gone full asshole and judging behind anon snark names, I’d have said something stupid too.

Of course Captain Contrarian has never said anything crazy, indefensible, or ill-advised. And he’s willing to share all his account names so people can go through them. Am I right, shining star…

At this point with all the internet gone full asshole and judging behind anon snark names, I’d have said something stupid too.

Of course Captain Contrarian has never said anything crazy, indefensible, or ill-advised. And he’s willing to share all his account names so people can go through them. Am I right, shining star…

That short stock hit piece revenue needs persistence and dedication by the gawkerdrones.

Funny, I’d guess most of gawker’s workforce in “new media” are similarly underpaid, overworked, dazed, and confused.

Women: DO NOT SAY YOU LOVE SHOPPING.

This thread is self-evident. Of so many things. Psychologically. If only you could see the glaring signs. Right there for the trained eye.

You forgot to rip on Musk and Tesla. Still falling down on the job I see. Do I have to do everyone’s work?

The Mission E / Taycan, which is a stupid name but not as stupid as that nerd Elon Musk, who never delivers on anything he says, will be available later in the year, and since it is Porsche that must be true,…

Well, that’s a lot more constructive that what you do with your day...