I have the perfect spokesperson for Boudreaux’s Butt Paste

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

All more years! All more years!

And now, your Friday feels:

Substance abuse is not a binary, it’s a spectrum. There are people who have had a bad bout with drinking in their youth and then learn to manage it when they’re older. The whole abstinence or bust dogma is a distinctly American phenomenon encouraged by AA and 12-step treatment centers which have really low success…

Aw man, really? MP seemed so normal! I’m the rehab program helped him out, but damn - there are other less culty ways, MP!

Welp- cross that guy off the cool guy list. Too bad- he was great in Ant-Man. Oh well. (God I love being an SP!)

Actually first they came for the mimes but everyone was pretty okay with that.

All I know is, anyone who puts on a scary clown outfit nowadays had some pretty big shoes to fill.

I long for the days when clowns didn’t bother anyone until 26 bodies were found in a crawlspace.

Did anyone else assume this was viral marketing for the new IT movie?

No safety gear.

ugh oh god. I remember an interview she did with Ray Liotta where she kept talking about how he was adopted and it was uncomfortable.

She drives me insane. IMO, one of her worst interviews is with Brittany Howard of the Alabama Shakes. TG seemed like she really wanted BH to be sad about her upbringing (living near the junkyard her parents owned; her sister dying of cancer at 13, etc.), and seemed really disappointed when BH would respond with…

A story that existed entirely within her own mind. The actual story was “I sat next to Odell Beckham and we didn’t talk.”

Wow. That was one helluva reach to cape for a woman so narcissistic she had to project her insecurities on an unwitting human being because she can’t fathom somebody not wanting to get to know her. Like, congratulations. That reach was damn near Herculean.

LENA DUNHAM HAS A HUGE EGO?! STOP THE FUCKING PRESSES