I travelled with a blond friend and what you say is true. I found it EXHAUSTING trying to navigate Italy with her, and I was just the ugly friend on the sidelines. I joked later that if we ever traveled together to a country where dark hair predominated, she’d have to dye it, or wear a wig or a scarf because it slowed…

Wow that’s harsh. I apologise for laughing.

Your mom’s smarter than a fuck of a lot of people I know, but yeah, definitely an asshole.

This is reminiscent of my mother’s “advice” to me when I went away to college: “Dumpy girls get raped too, you know.”

But seriously have you seen Wallander. EVERYONE gets raped and/or trafficked in Sweden

Looks like Jon Lovitz doesn’t need to be worried, then.

I’ve actually heard of the scam I think they’re referring to. Basically, it involves the target (usually a man) being lured by attractive locals and made to buy drinks for them. When he’s slapped with the absolutely exorbitant bill (He was probably tricked into buying drinks for some other people), the women are gone,…

This is definitely not at all true. I am not a “10" (probably somewhere over 6) but I have blonde hair. When I’ve traveled to places where blonde hair is uncommon, my rating definitely skyrockets.

I’m pretty sure that’s from one of those pants free subway rides.

My first wedding was the day after Charles and Diana had theirs. Mine only lasted 3 years and I do remember feeling so very much better when they finally divorced.

kitschy commemorative memorabilia

You are in my head. I simply don’t understand the purpose of Snapchat, other than for sexting. If it’s an innocuous photo, just share it on Instagram or Facebook or text it to your friends. Why does it need to disappear after 10 seconds?

Additionally, who the fuck wants to get a notification on their phone every time one of these D-list celebs posts on Instagram? I admit, I follow some D-list people, but I wouldn’t even want notification for family and friends, let alone some person I don’t even know but am mildly interested in.

I don’t even have an Instagram and I think the “popular posts first!” change is bullshit. It’s for them to get more ads on your feed. Absolutely fucking no one wants anything but reverse chronological. It’s the only way social media makes sense.

I don’t....understand what’s happening. I already follow people on instagram, that’s the whole reason I have them on it. Why do I need to follow them again?

EDIT Nevermind I’m hopeless, I read this article three times and I still don’t get it. Wha t a stupid idea instagram had

OK, serious question, why is anyone watching TLC any more?

I am reminded of an interview I saw with a newly wed couple who was on the Costa Concordia when it sank. The bride was in total disbelief that something terrible would dare happen on their honeymoon. Yes, because the true tragedy of people drowning in a preventable boating accident is how it impacted your honeymoon.

Spoiler: it’s also strapless.

Dear Bride,

One of the most tragic deaths I heard about was Oscar Wilde’s sisters. They were at a ball and one of the sisters’ dance partners danced her too close to the fireplace and she went aflame. Her poor sister went to help and they both died right there in the middle of the party. Way to be a Debbie Downer!