And then when there’s outrage in the comments, they try to CYA and roll it back by saying, “But it’s satire!” or “We’re actually trolling YOU to make a point!”

For fuck’s sake with these garbage humans.

This is all I’ve got to say (gasp in a moment of passion?) about this:

PREACH!!!!

I like your style.

Damn Hazel, you are ON FIRE right now. (Currently cracking up in the quiet car of my train. Dirty looks abound.)

Bagel cutting incident.

ILU. Thank you for this! I needed this giggle

Ha! My first thought was: I bet it’s a fedora. Too bad!

THIS IS THE GREATEST EVERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR! <333

Amazing!!!!! I want video of your dog doing the Elaine dance!

Blood orange juice, maybe, on occasion?

Most helpful diagram. Ever. It's cracking me up so much for some reason!

Well. I got my husband. But my husband didn’t get me. I, too, have questions.

Yaaaaaaaas. This. Totally. I had an incident with my boss recently and it got tense and I got angry, so I started crying, and he was like, “Don’t be so sensitive!” And I’m thinking, “Bitch, you are LUCKY I’m crying.”

Gasp! I KNEW something felt wrong, like my day was a sentence that didn't have a period at the end, and couldn't figure out why.... But you figured it out!

I hear ya. I cry when I'm angry. It's mostly out of frustration from not being able to Hulk smash when I'm angry. I hold it in, and it comes out in tears. I guess it's better than getting arrested!

oh cool!!! I didn't even realize!

Yes, thank you! I’ve been so upset since reading Burkett’s piece (and seeing positive responses on FB, etc) and I’ve been craving a response like this.

Holy crap! How terrifying. Hoping they’re in for a quick recovery, as the Drs seem to be expecting. Thank god there were no spinal injuries, getting pinned like that!