Reading these is uplifting. The same way that watching a Hooter’s Pageant once made me feel so much better that I had less cellulite than most of those women.

The more I think about it, this convoluted attempt at math may be better. Less than 25% of the population did vote for him David.

Are the pussies as giant as the legends say?

I went to the last Magary fan club meeting and it was all 19 year old models from Milan and Oil tycoons, so he’s not wrong.

“Pre-approved lane” is my favorite part of any of these.

I just assumed that was the complete working title of his memoir.

There’s no way Jason S. Garlock has ever made his wife cum.

Damn, reading those letters makes it seem like literacy isn’t a priority in your country. Weird right?

He might even be a beaker! Or, dare I say it, an Erlenmeyer flask?

I have been to Samolia, pretty nice actually. BTW, the exchange rate for US dollars on Samolians is GREAT right now....

Frankly, some of them have a point. If I wanted to read a bunch of stuff about Brady I’d go to his AKC page.

Samolia has long been a shining beacon of Free Enterprise... their currency is so stable that Bugs Bunny always wanted to settle debts using “Samolians” instead of Dollars....

From: Tom Ley

“Sent from Yahoo Mail on Android”

Coldblooded...

Dime Bags Two For One

forcibly turned away by protesters Friday when she attempted to enter a DC middle school

Later he gets the rebound. Passes it to the man. Shoots it. And boom goes the dynamite.

Lotta people been waiting on this so I’ll say it here on Deadspin