Even

“If he’s so white, why wasn’t he lined up as quarterback?” -Officer on the scene.

He was between the tackles, though, so they’ll start calling Donald for intentional grounding.

Nobody cares.

Imagine being so insecure that a fake woman holding a position of authority in a videogame made you uncomfortable. I'm not at all surprised that their celebacy is involuntary.

does this post actually make no sense to anyone else?

“There goes my hero.” - Roger Goodell, watching as Mark Emmert walks away

My first true memory of Vikings fandom came on my ninth birthday in 1998 when my aunt gave me tickets to see a game. I got to see rookie year Randy Moss torch the Bengals for a 61-yard TD. Our row won the “Row of Fame” and everyone was treated to a stale Dome Dog.

Marchman of all people criticizing someone’s palate? 

Alabama one percenters

If he presses back we’ll just tell him that it’s a mark of respect, and we polled the fuckhead population and they’re 90% okay with it.

Yeah, it almost always elicits a hilarious reply or two (see Sid and Financy above). So I keep doing it. It’s the gift that keeps on giving!

I’m surprised she told you about that.

UPDATE: The NFL has fined Ramsey for targeting defenseless players.

If you’re going to punish someone for doing something that takes balls, for God’s sake, ban Zack Hample.

That poor bastard, now he can only go to Padres and Phillies games.

Just a reminder, the highlight of Mets calendar is approaching quickly. Only 15 more shopping days left until Bobby Bonilla day.

Eh, even if he’s not as good at baseball, he will never not be a Good Baseball Man.

“But then Kyrie Irving went on a tear—mounting an 11-2 run by himself.”