John Carruthers
Proprietor of a bootleg pizza shop located in an alley. Beer writer by day and author of three cookbooks. Jean jacket enthusiast.

Getting to this way late - but wanted to kick in that Pizza Lunchables used to have Boboli brand sauce included in the kit (which is readily available for purchase) then at some point they switched to the generic whatever (which was a definite downgrade).  They also at some point went from basically a cracker crust to Read more

Let’s not dance around the winning design: Thin crust, tavern cut. Read more

Whole Foods has them in the deli area intermittently. Read more

Huh I always had just decided that flatbreads didn’t use yeast. And apparently that was not necessarily correct. Read more

I’m going to tinker with your flatbread pizza sauce recipe. I’m going to remove the bay leaf after simmering before blending. Nobody wants to eat bay leaves, no matter how small you chop them up. Read more

What a great article...I actually laughed a few times, totally felt the retro-vibes (I was a young professional in the early 2000's and TOTALLY into the gastropub scene), and frankly think the pizzas sound damn good. Read more

They haven’t vanished, they’ve gone suburban - you can find them at Safeway. Read more

Cameron Mitchell Restaurants Marcella’s do that style since it promotes itself as a shareable Italian experience. Read more

Can we get the McDLT first? I don’t want to impose, I just feel the McDLT has been forgotten.  Read more

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Apparently it was a tie-in with the movie Small Soldiers:

I...do have to admit, shamefully, that I have bought pizza lunchables in the past year. The nostalgia man. I make no excuses for their taste or texture, they are the type of stuff you think “This is terrible, why am I doing this?” while chewing it and yet keep eating. And then buy more. Read more

This is true sicko shit, well done. Read more

I am ashamed to admit I bought pizza lunchables on sale a month ago and could not resist air frying them and they were  . . . ok? They itched some primordial pizza urge for sure.  Read more

I think French food gets a bad rep for being tough to make but, like this recipe, it mostly seems to be about the time investment (and paying diligent attention to technique). But isn’t that mostly true of a lot of bucolic cooking? Read more

I almost never check the byline, but sooner or later, I always know when I’ve stepped into the Carruthers Zone. Read more

If there’s one trap that copycat recipes like this fall into, it’s that they want to elevate everything. We’ve replaced the tomato paste slurry with San Marzanos, and this duck prosciutto stands in nicely for that unpleasant pepperoni. NO. STOP. We came here for GARBAGE and we are gonna GET IT.” Read more

1/8 tsp. Italian seasoning you should have thrown away two years ago Read more

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Lunchables Pizza fails horribly when compared to actual pizza, but damn did I fucking love eating them as a kid.

In that last picture, I’m pretty sure you have topped those pizzas with dried apricot slices. Read more

Spam is revolting cold. Cooked, in something like a sandwich or M & C, it’s good. Read more