Great, more phishing schemes to look out for.

It’s a libertarian/small government dog whistle that insists government has “run amok” and isn’t accountable. In this specific case, it’s so transparently a dog whistle because one of the hallmark features of the Federal Reserve is its independence from the executive branch and the political parties. It lets the…

The only thing that would be worse than the Fed being run by "unelected officials" is if it was run by elected officials

He can do TWO voices, you ignorant slut!

Having just spent ten years making my horrible starter home worth living in, then selling it, I can attest that the line between fixing up a house and performing Sisyphean labors in hell does blur after a while.

I’m so glad the weekend’s here. Time to kick back, get stoned, and leave Celine Dion off my own list of the 200 Greatest Singers of All Time.

Extra relevant since this was originally tweeted on 1/6/21

I think you need to put “brain” and/or “trust” in quotation marks there.

I’m not TomatoFace. I’m his publicist.

“It’s a shame. It makes us look foolish. If I didn’t know any better, it’s like the Democrats paid these people off... Let’s make it look like the Republicans can’t govern and don’t deserve any gavels whatsoever. That’s what it makes it look like.”

Elect clowns, get a circus.

You can probably cross off “criminal mastermind.”

Seems he’ll be going to prison precisely because he has a hard time letting teenagers go.

Yeah. I really hate to see NFTs’ good name dragged through this.

I for one am flabbergasted. I refuse to believe someone as fine and upstanding as Logan Paul would do this.

oops you just failed your police officer exam

Go ahead and take your star(burns).

If you’re gonna do a fantasy story, you have exactly two choices for the central object: a magic sword or a magic ring. The remainder of the story is generated by AI. 

If The Cramps had mass appeal and were “tiktok material” they wouldn’t be The Cramps.