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Isn’t that what the rich do, though? Because they think the “poors” are going to ransack their homes, one day? They build some fortified fucking castle in a gated neighborhood and hire private security.

the only reason he thinks he can get away with it is literally every single experience he’s ever had.

The thing that gets me about this is that there’s literally no other scenario in the world where a dink like Stevens would do this to someone like Lowry who could clearly and easily kick the shit out of him. The only thing that lets someone like Stevens think he can get away with it is a lifetime of thinking that…

5 to 1 he tears his ACL by week five.

Wait wait wait. Hold on. Temecula already has a thing. We can’t have TWO highly insular Temecula jokes running around here at the same time.

So stay tuned for next week’s installment of Dead Letters

I’ve got Tuesday in the pool for how long until we find out this kid tweeted something offensive in high school.

I leave a tube of tooth paste in my carry on and 12 TSA agents strip search me while several large men with guns watch but these people are just brawling in front of hundreds of people and there are no cops???

God I would hate to be a Houston Raptors fan come playoff time 

I wait for the umpires reasoning to not eject Molina

He clearly shoved that ump The Right Way™. Had he done it any other way it would be an ejection, suspension, and/or a fine.

Guarantee it was not about playing the game the right way.

Yeah, I can see how “begins heel turn” really suggests people are taking this super seriously as something to be upset about.

Breaking: God revealed to be old white man.

Because he was drunk as hell.

I’m not the first to point it out, but this take by Ley aged beautifully.

Seriously, knock off the “3 arrests” shit.

Marky Mark? Go the fuck away.

I have no love for the Bruins bu I still don’t see the interference. The play was always being made on a loose puck, in the crease that Jake Allen was not covering and didn’t know where it was. Were the players supposed to just stop and wait for him to cover it?