“But you basically have to shove the ball up your butt to complete a catch in the end zone.”

He’s black.

My partner saw the entire SMEG lineup one day while we were at the mall, and I don’t think I’ve ever seen him laugh so hard in his life. I had to stop him from buying the toaster for our kitchen. We need a toaster, but not THAT badly.

It’s technically not napping when you’re running a length of garden hose from the tail pipe into the cab of the vehicle. 

My kids are fucking amazing. I’ll be asleep for about 3-4 minutes and they’ll seek me out and wake me up. I once went to my wife’s car in the garage just so I could have some quiet and for the first time in recorded history, my eldest decided he wanted to play in the backyard and barged into the garage to get some…

Not a single Red Dwarf reference? Internet, I am disappoint.

“in University” and “Kraft Dinner” outs Nicholas as a low-down, shifty-eyed, Labatt-drinking Canuck.

Working on it

Now all we need is the article on all the things people shoved up their asses this year and 2017 will be complete!

And if you can, pick a candidate and try to volunteer to help them get elected. This Times story about the recent Virginia election is very revealing. 2018 is going to be the year of doing the hard work.

Vote. Fucking vote. You have to fucking vote.

Ugh, take your star you savage.

Fuck Roy Moore.

Well, we did do the nose.... and the hat...

Honestly, this is even better.

I’m willing to bet that she weighs the same as a duck

I couldn’t have said it better myself. I’d buy Yuengling over some over-hopped Brooklyn super IPA garbage any day.

Haha. I mean, the last few years I’ve become a craft beer nerd/snob, but Yuengling is still best of the worst among shitty, mass-produced adjunct lagers.

Gotta get this into the regular rotation

For sure. Whoever came up with boiling sprouts should be in prison.