It was really cool how Seattle wanted to tax enormous businesses just a liiiiiiittle bit to help fix our shameful, soul-crushing homelessness epidemic and Amazon (read: Bezos) threw all their weight behind the opposition. So cool. I love having an enormous parasite in my hometown. Like a tapeworm, it helps keep us…

This explains Mike Zunino.

Deadspin needs a Splinter-style purge.

I’m not sure either, just spit-balling. Whatever happens, the only reason for optimism is a Democrat-controlled house. My blood pressure has settled a bit, finally.

I think Mueller, being the the dude he is, would probably recuse himself if fired. But I would imagine he could recommend a suitable replacement to House dems if and when any of this happens.

+1 for sentiment, -1000 for execution, Dad.

The only positive I can see is that it’s a form a population control, but not nearly effective enough to help humanity avoid the oncoming horrors of overpopulation. So, not really a positive.

Truthfully I didn’t know if there was some sort “sneakerhead code” or bylaws one must follow to be deemed a “sneakerhead” so I turned to the experts:

Gatekeeping is lame. Especially lame when it’s as inconsequential as this.

Someone put me in a coma and wake me up mid-November 2020. I want off this ride. It doesn’t feel surreal anymore, just real. Too fucking real.

I’d be so much more scared of this entire shit-show if they were even remotely competent. There are plenty of amoral pieces of shit with a proper resume for this job that, some dem grandstanding aside, would get confirmed easily.

Things you can’t stop, ranked:

Curt Menefee describing this Thursday’s game between the Raiders and the 49ers as the “Someone has to win this one Bowl” was so good and so perfect.

The most important pieces of statistical information to come out of last night’s barrage of threes:

This is nonsense, if anything Draymond has established himself as the mortal enemy of pricks.

Almost every day we’re reminded that, “May you live in interesting times” is most definitely not positive.

Fuck if they could speak marginal English I’d hire one of these people in an instant. The courage, resolve and commitment it takes to undergo that journey knowing what kind of fuckshit clownshow that awaits them is an order of magnitude greater than your average American citizen possesses.

I don’t have perfect teeth and developed a bit of a complex when I was young. Now, in my mid-30s, I’m pretty well over it. This is a long way of saying, “Thank you”, for showing us some teeth that are way way way way worse than mine. Makes young adult me feel much better.

I wanna know what they think about the world’s tallest man investigating these crimes in the header image.

Both Morris twins seem like raging assholes and the NBA is better for it.