I’m more amazed that someone recognized Chad Kelly.

The flattened man is eventually able to come to his feet.

This is a weird way to tell us you drafted David Johnson first for your fantasy team.

Tannehill should have been listed as “limited.”

And let’s not forget how bad the attendance numbers look once you account for the fact that Philip Rivers’ family is responsible for filling half of the seats.

“If he’s so white, why wasn’t he lined up as quarterback?” -Officer on the scene.

There’s no way Tom Brady was going to let go of that ball just because Breeland grabbed his legs. You have to yell “Droppit!” and pull it out of his mouth. It’s so annoying because he knows you can’t throw it for him again unless he lets go of it.

+1 -1 finger.

Hey now, let’s be careful about blowing things up.

Freeze Condition Blamed on Climate Change

AAU star’s lookin’ through an issue of Slam magazine

“Also hearing a lot of players were entranced by Butler’s unique aroma and animal magnetism. Several asked if they could move in with him and just marinate themselves in his powerful, masculine splendor.”

“I really just try to stay out of the way of everything. That’s what I’m told to do.”

Hopefully she’s able to get away while his foot is stuck.

I gotta say, respect to the Madden curse for really upping its fucking game. No resting on laurels there. 

surprised they put up with Erecktal dysfunction for as long as they did tbh

He’d definitely leave the rod in somewhere.

Catholic high school rules: it ain’t sex if it’s another hole.

“Yeah, but it’s a dry humping” -Arizona Cardinals