So, it’s still an up hill battle in the game of thrones. I am just going to break it down to a few simple thoughts.

I am not a chef. I mean this in the most literally applicable terms. Now, I may be a skilled cook, but chef is a word that gets tossed around so much, journalist, might think they can be one. From Tom scocca to the lamest print journalist, everyone has an opinion on food.

I invite you guys to join me. This is particularly hard for me because I am an incredible asshole, but since the 9th of November I have been nothing but a bleached asshole with an opinion. Lol, I can do better, you can do better, let’s do better!!

Now I know we aren’t talking about ourselves. Just maybe we are a naturally abhorrent genre of the human species. Buckle up for a wild 4 years of being Shit on. Today, January 20th, 2017 we will have the most spineless, vulgar, detested, LAZY, selfish, unempathic, vile, ungracious, egomaniac, sloven, entitled,…

Damn Joe, you okay? The fire department is on the way.

I really have a theory. It is probably completely wrong, but it is my hail marry pass, my lonnng shot play. So Obama knew Trump got played by the Russians. Knew it. For a fact. At the very least he knew they hacked the DNC AND the RNC. You give that shit to Julian, he obviously is an ego maniac, releases anything to…

1. Lie: I am from the Midwest. This should not be a shocker, but hanging out with 3rd party voters and supporters of fascism was never my bag. Sure I said I was coming but gosh darnit, I couldn’t make it. I wish I could have seen your face dad when you open that envelope with a donation to planned parenthood in your…

Lol, what did these dumb motherfuckers think was going to happen. https://trumpgrets.tumblr.com

I kinda like this show. If Dracula, Dorian Grey, Frankenstein, Dr. Jekyll, wolfman, all had an orgy, which they pretty much do, you would get Penny Dreadful. Ever wonder what sex with Satan was like? Penny Dreadful.

because this country gave my family a home when we didn’t have one. because there is only hope by the voting part of the population that stays, because it is not fucking handed to you.

After 108 years we finally pulled one in. 2003 was devastating to me. Genital correct bear was nauseous. Wood, Prior, Zambrano, being toasted in in 04' because dusty Baker is a shit heel, gone. Bartman, a Billy goat, and half a dozen other curses get tossed to the baseball gods. You can’t take anything away from…

Sometime last night, while drinking Jameson and playing fallout 4, I took a cigarette break. This morning/early afternoon I woke up to go to work and sure as shit my neighbors Trump Pence sign is laying on my bedroom floor.

Step 1. Start off by finding something that you feel extremely passionate about. Step 2. Accept that half of the people that read your take are going to vehemently disagree. Step 3. Go balls deep defending this opinion even if it means desecrating a loved ones grave, killing an infant, punching the pope. Step 4. act…

Chicken and pasta have had many children together. They for centuries have been great companions. Here is my take on a well traveled dish.

Look, your stories about being marginalised are great and all, but my personal triumphs about not raping women are far greater. Also this post is much better than the one before it. Let me crawl into your interweb safe space! Raw!! Man spread!