If you aren't using Irish Spring, you're basically a dirty bastard.

That woman's husband has to smell her dirty ass in their bed.

This is a really weird post.

Are we supposed to believe that Arabelle Sicardi is a real name?

My wife buys Dove. It literally will not get dirt off of my son.

Tell me more. Slowly.

I don't have the attention span to read all of that. Can someone please send me some notes or some Ritalin?

Two Dez. One bucket.

Exactly!

I'm playing our daily Pick 3 in hopes of winning a smoke detector. Until then my kids sleep in asbestos pjs with a bucket of weather on their night stands.

Oh no! Not stealing stars!

B-

Literally no way to make this woman happy.
She's a victim of people doing what she wants them to do.

I'll wear an "I Can't Breathe" shirt in her honor.

You're not including that pant suit, are you? Cause it's fantastic - ish.

We get it. You're too cool to even like white people; much less be a white person. What kind of douche bag writes an entire blog about these douche bags?

Hack comedian?
Clearly you've not seen "Soul Plane".

College Seniors, two illegitimate children...shocked by the drama in their lives. Bad decisions and lack of self control abound.

You're arguing with people that you're not going to convince though. If they had any interest in actually knowing the truth, they'd know it by now.

Look at the garbage the Falcons have at Guard.