"Don't tell your Mom."

This is some Don Drapper level passive-aggressive hostility. Next thing you know they'll be sleeping on polyester sheets and bathing with Ivory bar soap.

"The kids were absolutely ravenous," remarked an onlooker. "At one point they cut the throat of a raccoon and feasted on the blood while cooing "'sweet nectar.'" Another witness noted that blood-soaked copies of acclaimed hit Country Strong were found scattered around the restaurant.

Don't forget WHITE, CAPITALIST JESUS HATES ABORTION AND POOR PEOPLE!

No, teen pregnancies are only of value when they serve as cautionary tales of shame and regret.

YEAH, WE DID. BUT THEY'RE STILL EPIC FAILURES SOMETHING SOMETHING MORALS, SOMETHING SOMETHING NOT ABLE TO REDEEM THEMSELVES SOMETHING SOMETHING DESPITE REDEMPTION BEING A CENTRAL THEME TO THE CHRISTIAN RELIGION SOMETHING SOMETHING OBAMA SOMETHING SOMETHING.

I read somewhere that French women concentrate on their legs and the hair just falls out.

Good points. They say, "Spend a week in country X and you can write a book about it. Spend a month and you can write an article. Spend a year and you can't write anything." Takes a while to see the big picture.

Someone remind me: how many abortion clinics in TX were shut down because they didn't meet some bullshit requirements about door width and such?

This is actually a replacement. Until 2003 the official fossil of South Carolina was Strom Thurman.

correction: Strom Thurmond was their state fossil.

Oh that's just wonderful! The sea turtle had already discussed the issue of family not being welcome in the delivery room. All she wanted was some privacy, and yet here's a whole group of people taking pictures of her crotch. What is this, a birth episode on the Kardashians? A bit of sensitivity wouldn't hurt you,…

An omen: You will have many children, but most of them will not survive.

I'm still waiting for a good deed to go unpunished or a bad one to go unrewarded!

Fingolfin would have hacked the tire of the car as it drove over him.

Fingolfin, is that you?

I would watch this show if the contestants thought they were vying for the affections of Harry Potter.