Pointless fact: the woman in the trailer (Marin Hinkle) is the actress who played Jon Cryer’s ex on Two and a Half Men.

“Fine, I guess I’m just so used to it being totally glossed over on this site that I missed it. Still...”

Nonono, there’s no “still”. You were simply wrong and an asshole.

“but is the literal cat lady played by Any Sedaris?”

Nope, not any of them. Not Amy, not David... 

Yeah, it’s weird. But it’s a small role. But it’s weird.

“Ask The Salty Waitress: How do I get my server to leave me alone?”

Nope.

“I’ve never had a homeless woman come up to me and, apropos of nothing, offer to perform sexual favors in exchange for pie.”

You walk around carrying pie a lot? 

You think that was a joke?

“I think the point is that at a corporate/publicity standpoint, calling your food an addictive drug is bad.”

Except that it’s not. People LOVE Tosi’s Crack Pie. It is one of their best sellers.

“I take your point, but I don’t think that’s a very good example because “the bomb” has more or less fallen out of usage (hasn’t it?).”

OK, well then how about “that is the shit”, as a positive descriptor? 

“Like, if you wouldn’t joke about a “heroin pie” or an “oxy pie”...”

Why would anyone use heroin or oxy as a descriptor? We already have one food=drugs reference, we don’t need anything?

What are you, on crack??? 

“Crack is an entirely different case.”

It is? Find me one single person who would believe that there is crack in Crack Pie.

Just one. 

“If you care that much, rename it “meth cake” and mock the suffering of a different group of addicts.”

How about I just call it crack pie, and you just go fuck yourself? 

“I think it trivializes a terrible problem.”

You should try living in the real world someday. 

“For the Last Time, Stop Calling Food ‘Crack’”

It’s getting exactly that.

“Despite the lack of homicidal intent, the original First Blood played at times like a slasher movie in which the audience was expected to root for the maniac.”

Wow, what an entertaining misreading of John Rambo. The maniac? If you’re comparing First Blood to a slasher, then John is the innocent virginal girl.

“Bob Odenkirk’s next film role is sounding a little bit Walter White”

“Say what you will about how evil Uber is but i don’t think the customers are getting screwed.”

Tell that to the customers who have been literally raped. 

God, you’re a fucking idiot.