I want to high-five you so hard right now. On related note, this asshole from my high school who would relentlessly bully the fuck out of kids was de-pantsed by Judge Judy on national tv. He was a defendant and got his butt gloriously ripped wide open by her. I was jumping up and down shouting “USA! USA!” the whole…

So many years ago when edamame was first become a thing, I was served a bowl at a sushi restaurant and ate the whole damn pod until the server very sweetly advised that I eat the beans inside and discard the pod. In my defense, I would always eat the entire sunflower seed, not just the kernel inside. My body must…

You shut your filthy mouth! Chipotle or bust, although the free guacamole thing is pretty persuasive.

I admit, I saw the boobs first and thought they were Janet’s. I have been hyper sensitive about her new single/tour, and I think every new Jez post is going to be about her.

I would take the full beard over the pudding cup goatee. Looking at that picture though, I can tell both of them like to smell their own farts.

Whoa! Surprisingly upbeat! I dig it.

My mom, walking behind me into a grocery store during my senior year of high school: “I can really tell you’re not playing soccer anymore..” after I had quit the varsity squad 6 months prior to devote myself to the theater program.

Seeing MCA just makes me so sad.

More importantly, would it kill him to smile??

Need more Monkees gifs up in here!!

Maybe I’m just an old fart around here, but this is a ripoff of Madonna’s Borderline video but glossier (maybe it’s the Frizz Ease?).

Super sweet! Bonus stars if your husband’s cousin is Geddy Lee!

Our Justice of the Peace - a complete stranger to us - had big fat tears leaking out of his eyes as I walked down the aisle at our wedding. My husband noticed too, which set him off. I was already on shaky ground since I’m a big baby and cry if someone looks at me cross-eyed. But it was sweet and something we always…

The tabloids were all floating the name Belinda, which may sincerely be perfect.

Spill the tea, pronto.

FAVORITE BUGS EPISODE!

Letterman stopped being funny when he stopped throwing shit off of buildings just to see what would happen.

She was a complete lush.

SHORT-TORSOED WOMEN REJOICE!

You can suck my culo chicka!