That’s 1970s-Sun-In-from-Woolworth’s-accident blond.

So love that you got it. And you know Veda would have insisted on staying at your namesake. Or the Plaza.

That “She’s a Rainbow” send-off they did--which apparently, they’ve never done for anyone else--cemented this idea for me. 

Oh my goodness, yes. I couldn’t watch that movie for the longest time. Dorothy Parker was my adolescent saving grace, and JJL’s jaw-wired-shut hardness did NOT work. 

Yep, that’s me.

This might make me very unpopular, but Kristin Wiig. I feel like she’d be a very sly mean girl in person (the “It’s so cool that you don’t care whether boys think you’re hot” type), and I don’t fully understand the appeal of her comedy. I also wanted to slap her character a lot in Bridesmaids.

Thank you. He was an editor. He made a really dumb editorial decision; ergo, he is no longer an editor. If his name were Irene Buruma, there still would have been harsh consequences for running that idiotic piece.

Actually, they should go to work in an Amazon fulfillment center. That’s way worse than Starbucks. And with Schmuck a L’Orange making it unsafe to be poor and Mexican (with or without documents) I’m sure there’s a strawberry field in California that could use an extra hand. 

If the story is true, Beyonce’s shoes cost $49.99 according to the company website. That makes me unreasonably happy.

I turned 51 on Monday, and I’d give her my seat on the bus.

Our condo association president is named Justin. He’d be a lot less insufferable if he looked like Josh Meyers. Instead, he looks like the love child of Dennis Franz and an elderly beaver.

He took the Hot Guy role on That ‘70s Show after Ashton Kucher left. Or maybe it was the Guy Who Likes Donna role. I dunno. He was on that show with major Andy Gibb hair.

Cicely Tyson is 93 years old. She wins everything by default.

I had no idea! (Runs to freezer to check which brand is in there in order to feel self-righteous and rainbow-clad and worthy of my toaster oven.)

“A red wave” sounds like some sort of dorm-wide period syncing. Mike Pence’s face would melt off like the guy in Raiders of the Lost Ark. 

And some kids (especially those a little older than Jenny) can suss out the reaction of their parents if they tell, so they don’t even try. 

“ . . . that he hired an antiques specialist to find, ultimately spending $22,000 on it. The typewriter once belonged to Gregory Corso’s fourth-grade teacher and is totally not exactly like a typewriter you could get for $50 at most antique malls.”

Or some shit like that.

Don’t forget the split-lengthwise hot dog. People drive miles for that shit.

Yep, shade. In fact, I’ll call shade-ish since it’s really not that subtle.

Also, Chrissy’s concerns and passions are pretty public. Imagine if the cost of that monstrosity had been donated to a charity she cares about in Miles’s name instead. That would have gotten ALL kinds of props. Instead, a medicine ball made of…

Before I clicked on the link, I was really hoping she was his age (54), and looked at least 50. A girl can dream . . .