Rather than a dish towel, put the person who only partially unloads the dishwasher in with the next load of dishes. This should solve the problem.

The fact that he was falsely accused of a crime is just further proof that Whitehead isn’t Cowboys material.

It’s so dangerous to be that close. The Ferrari could burst into flames at any moment.

“He kept flinging himself forcefully at my club. I tried to walk away, but he kept smashing head-first into it! I was scared for my life!”

As long as you don’t have cheap domes

This list is invalid considering Spider-Pig isn’t included.

Aw, I thought he worked out great

Your girlfriend should wash more often!

She’ll never be better than she was in Career Opportunities

I can’t make too much fun. I will be a fat, balding 40 something pretty soon. All I need to do is start saving up for my TypeR

Don’t be silly, apple would never forget to price gouge...

If more sequels took this approach, we might not be so sick of them.

Well she did say the government experimented on her!

Don’t they open inwards?

You already know this: in rugby, there’s no forward passing.

In college, I saw my first porn (not just pics). An upperclassman had his door open, and invited us in as my friend and I walked by (first month of freshman semester). “Hey, you guys wanna some porn?!”

Or, her ring left it all out there?

Kids today don’t know...

I think they are this incestuous children of Banner and She-Hulk. Cause Marvel is the worst.

So everyone, answer me this:

Did HANNAH DAVIS decide which photo ended up on the cover? Did she make that call? Or did she just, you know, show up, do her job, and then someone chose that photo?

Did HANNAH DAVIS think "Yeah, I think I'll pull my bathing suit down a little, that is an idea I am having personally" or was…