How Newspapers Are Wording Their Own Obituaries
If anyone else is weirded out by newspapers trying to dispassionately report news of their decline, look away now.
French Convict the Church of Scientology of Fraud, Almost Ban It
The haughty, stubbornly secular, French have convicted the Church of Scientology of fraud. Just for pressuring two women to pay tens of thousands of dollars for spurious Scientological products and services! Victimization of religion says this oily spokesman.
Bush Is Back! Forges New Folksy Speaking Career
Dubya has mainly been writing a book in crayon since leaving the Oval Office, with his tongue stuck out to help him concentrate. But, perhaps upset that Michael Steele is the only person regularly gaffe-ing, he's back and giving speeches!
Scientologists Are Persistent, Diane von Furstenberg's Fashionable Mugging
The Scientology flack who walked out on Bashir came back and tried to have Nightline cut, Steve Phillips' ESPN squeeze is, inevitably, also fired, Timberlake's stalker is cheating on him, while Diane von Furstenberg's Madrid mugging was tweeted.
Islamic Extremists Target Beyonce
The Muslim Brotherhood In Egypt is a political organization that once included Sayyid Qutb, the man who inspired Al-Qaeda. It was founded to promote Islamic law, oppress women etc. And now it wants to keep Beyonce out of Egypt!
If You're Going to Sleep With a Co-Worker, Do It at CBS Not ESPN
Baseball analyst Steve Phillips was fired by the sports network for having an affair with a co-worker the Post cruelly refers to as "a portly production assistant."
Bill Keller: Apple Tablet 'Impending'
Bill Keller may have casually mentioned that Apple's not-officially-happening-but-clearly-happening tablet computer is imminent and that the New York Times are working to bring content to it.
More Conservatives Accuse the White House of Being Mean
Clearly the war with Fox News has given the Obama team a thirst for red (politically) blood. They've now been accused of a campaign of "invectives" and "name-calling" against the global warming-denying US Chamber of Commerce.
I Can't Afford to Tell You I Can't Afford to Love NY
'I love NY' T-Shirts? About $2. New, meme-tastic 'I Can't Afford To Love NY' T-Shirts? $19.99 (including shipping) from some hipster who prints onto American Apparel because apparently the new avoiding cliches is diving headlong into cliches.
Which High-Profile War Correspondent Is a Spy?
Journalists are often accused of being spies. Military sources now say that one, currently working in a war zone, is in fact a real-life secret agent.